Marriage is a serious relationship that binds two souls forever, but it is also one of the most complex relations that exist on Earth. When two unique personalities get tied together, there is possible scope for clashes as well.
Love is an important factor, but not enough for a successful partnership. So, WHAT? Partnerships require concerted work from both sides. They require listening, empathy, awareness, strong boundaries, teamwork & consistency, to name a few. You might need to look for a love marriage problem solution often to deal with your marital problems. Several reasons serve as contact networks between the partners in a marriage talk is not enough. There are many ways such as thoughts, desires, soft-touch, making each other happy can be a more powerful form of communicating to keep the marriage on track and love alive.
Marriage does not require any magic potion to sustain, but all it needs is compromise and a bit of cooperation from both partners. Only this way can the relationship last forever. It is very surprising that many times marriages reach the point of divorce over such petty issues that are impossible to believe.
Changes to expect after getting married
Marriage, both for men and women, is a significant step and a huge life change. Marriage is not merely between two souls in India, but the bond between the two families. In India, broken marriage is a big thing. Marriage has a lot of other variables involved.
If you are marrying the girl you love or the girl your family has selected for you is the first consideration. It will make a lot of difference to this decision. A major aspect of understanding and adjusting with each other cuts down if you marry the girl you love. Things get better for both of them when you marry someone you know.
The second case is when you find an acceptable match for your parents, which is an arranged marriage. In this situation, when everything totally changes for the rest of your life, things get a little complicated and difficult.
In India, children live in the house of their parents, despite being independent. The bride is supposed to move to her husband’s house and live with his relatives, according to Indian culture. This includes a lot of improvements to the man’s home. Things are beginning to function differently now.
How Marriage Problems Occurs These Days?
Relationships had been a blissful feeling. Well, I think relationships are more about hook-ups nowadays than about commitments. We would find someone fortunate in the olden days who was able to find a partner who loved them. Today, on the other hand, every day, people find new love. A huge thank you to the different apps for virtual matchmaking and dating. Many customers come to me with the issue that either their spouse, whether for marriage or any other relationship decision, is not ready to commit. I don’t deny fully that true love doesn’t exist, it does.
The kind of relationship issues I face each day, however, is bizarre. For several, modern-day relationships have become a joke. Nowadays, in the name of love, people just look for joy and excitement.
People just want someone, not someone who can understand us, to watch movies or hang out with. Love is a wonderful feeling, and it is very hard to explain it in words. Without emotions and feelings, we may conclude that love has become just a term. There are many theories why modern interactions struggle.
A very old friend of mine spent ten long years in a relationship with a tall and handsome man. Both of them were well-settled and independent.
One day, however, there was a knock at my door around two in the afternoon. My friend stood there in a very disturbed state, as I went to the door to check. Because of the tears, her eyes were swollen and she was in a pathetic state. I took her in and asked what the problem was. To this, she replied, He left. We’ve broken-up.
I was surprised to hear the answer when I asked her what reason he gave or why he took such a crucial step. A ten-year relationship ended with the guy saying, I have no feelings for you.
You see, if they feel some kind of affection, how simple it is for some people to give up. It takes initiative to leave someone with whom you have been together for six years.
People today are afraid of committing. They find it easier to run away from the relationship rather than mending the chances.
What are the major issues people face in modern marriages?
- Lust before love
It is one of the most widespread explanations why modern interactions struggle. People think that it’s love, but it’s just lust that they crave most of the time. Individuals are more drawn to the body of the other person and not the soul. We need to really understand the difference between lust and love. The trick is respecting one another, and there should be space for love. Physical relationships can evolve spontaneously until you can grasp each other’s emotions.
- Not able to stay single anymore
This is probable one of the main reasons that make people come into commitment. People are tired of the single tag on them and that is why they move towards getting committed. But it is high time that the young couples need to understand the seriousness of the issue. You need to make sure that you are ready to take such a responsibility otherwise your relationship will end up in a ruckus.
- Lack of commitments
It is another major explanation why many modern relationships come to an end, as described earlier. Couples are scared to make commitments today. They promise thousands of things, but they struggle to do so when it comes to keeping those promises. When it comes to marriage, I have seen many individuals end their long relationships. Promises are easy to make, but to meet the promises requires a lot of bravery.
Sometimes, the bitterness does not emerge from inside the relationship but from external dynamics because of husband-wife dispute, unjust behaviour, differences of values and concepts, misunderstandings that appear to affect the marriage union.
- Financial issues
Financial challenges may create a pattern of stress and derogatory interactions, disconnection, conflicts, and stresses that the bond partner’s share.
If a few are trapped in destructive chains of accusation, defensiveness, blame-games, and contempt, they are continually eroding the affection, intimacy, and warmth they share.
When do you need to go for marriage counselling?
There is also a stigma related to marriage counselling. Most individuals believe that only couples who are going to split or break up can seek marital counselling. But the truth is, every wedding has its challenges. Many partners may benefit from marital counselling.
You don’t have to be married, but it’s called “marriage counselling.” Any couple should pursue relationship counselling, regardless of the type of relationship. I intend marriage advice for heterosexual families, gay couples, couples of both sexes, and couples in less traditional relationships (long-distance; open marriages; married, but not living together).
- For couples who believe they have the same husband wife dispute repeatedly, it’s hard to see eye-to-eye or come up with a solution.
- Couples who disagree about parenting, financial, or lifestyle decisions.
- Couples who feel that household roles are unreasonable and cannot figure out how to speak about all of this effectively or come up with suggestions.
- Couples who feel that they have lost their sexual or emotional chemistry.
- Couples that sound like they are on their marriage auto-pilot.
- Emotionally, couples who are embarrassed by or feel like their partner are unavailable.
What leads a marriage to a situation like divorce?
Nowadays , when I get an invitation for a wedding, I just want to bless the couple and family with a happy and lifelong togetherness.
Marriages have become so shattered like cheap Chinese goods. Yeah, no idea how long they will last. In essence, young people have become more intolerant, greedy, alone, open to the world beyond marriage. The numerous other factors leading to divorces have been added to by lack of values, social media, technological progress, keeping away from joint families. The old-fashioned views of remaining in a marriage for the sake of family, kids or culture are no longer dictating how people choose to live their lives.
Women are becoming independent
Gone are the days when women used to put on kilos of sindoor and sing mera pati mera devta hai.
Now, it is the time to make your own identity rather than take the tantrums of any person who thinks he can control your life. This is the reason that women are being told to get educated and continue a profession so that they can lead a respectful life after marriage as well.
- Marriage Communication
The hormonal rush does not feel the need to resolve major premarital problems initially prior to marriage. I might save many marriages from even occurring because there were many differences between two individuals coming together, such as a place of work, a non-working spouse, a place of stay, family concerns, financial preferences, etc and those in relationship counselling will speak about their serious problems and are now living happy marriages.
- Cheating and marriages
Exposure in the workplace, travelling with opposite sex colleagues and social media also contributed a lot to extra marital relationships. A family and a partner’s sanctity is not understood.
- Following Rules After Marriage
Within a week, one of my client daughters who spent millions of rupees marrying her daughter in India broke her marriage as her newly married husband wanted the bride to touch his parents’ feet.
- Compatibility of sexuality
Medical conditions related to sexual compatibility are often established, unknown, etc. To deal with them and seek medical advice, we need to be careful . Intolerance, swift decisions, egos and complexes, however, lead them to divorce instead of resolving this issue.
When do you feel like your relationship has died?
When the other partner is not reacting properly in a relationship. First, ‘attempts’ were made to preserve the connection or link. In vain, however.
It was just the first person to do so for so long, and now he has given up, too. Since, to enjoy, to treasure, nothing is left to share.
No support for each other emotionally. Need is not sensed. Absence or appearance is not perceived. No nothing here.
I would tell then that the partnership ended.
What is the best approach to relationship problems according to me?
It can be one of the most satisfying experiences of your life to get into a committed relationship. There will also be moments, though, that you will need to make tough choices and you will be faced with a variety of relationship issues that you need to resolve.
There was an elderly couple there once. For a long time, they were married, but the wife suffered from dementia. She wasn’t able to recall anything. But, never did her husband leave, not even for a second. The husband was wounded once while doing some job. To have a bandage done, he went to a nearby clinic. He asked her to hurry-up as the nurse was doing his bandage, as his wife had to wait.
The nurse asked why he was in a rush like that. He said that my wife had to look for me, that I had to go to her, that she had dementia and that she was really ill.
The nurse said, Oh! Then she shouldn’t even know why you’re her husband, why you’re so worried.
The husband answered, Even if she doesn’t know that I’m her husband, I know that she’s my wife, and I need to look after her.
The nurse was shocked to see the sort of devotion and sense of responsibility that the husband had to his sick wife.
You have a variety of key choices when it comes to finding out what the love marriage problem solution to issues could be. You and your partner will sit around and bicker over everything in the world. Although this is seldom successful, sometimes it can definitely be cathartic. Seeing your partner’s eyes rolling in derision if you bring up a subject as touchy as infidelity can also be rewarding.
You may feel like you’re getting away with something, or like, in your rage, you’re somehow justified. The issue with this process, though, is that it perpetuates the issue. You’ll only keep making the stress grow and you’ll never get anywhere instead of seeing it for what it is, and working towards a solution.
Being a life coach, I think forgiveness is the best solution to modern relationship issues. All of your relationships will heal as soon as you learn to forgive.
You and not the other person are released by forgiveness. We get inner mental peace when we forgive someone. Your life is simpler and lighter than most others, if you know how to forgive. Let us practise forgiving and forgetting.