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Modern relationship problems, nowadays, require modern solutions like marriage counseling.

As a life coach, I (Ritu Singal) often wonder what would have happened had a life coach been there to guide me when I was going through a difficult phase with my now departed husband, who died to suicide.

I definitely wish I had consulted a life coach when I could, maybe then my husband would have been well and alive today, maybe then my marriage with him wouldn’t have ended on such a dark note.

In this blog, I will first start with explaining why I say that a marriage counselor would have helped in my marriage, and then move on to reasons why other couples may require marriage counseling.

How a marriage counselor / life coach could have helped my marriage

I was a happily married woman until the birth of my two daughters. However, at a point in time, my husband started having an affair with another woman, which totally shattered me mentally and emotionally and drained me of my feelings of self worth and confidence.

I knew everything about how he was cheating on me, and treating me as an acquired but now useless trophy. I wish I had confronted him openly then and taken the help of a marriage counselor, to improve the conditions of my marriage, and my life.

It would have definitely improved my quality of life tenfold and maybe even saved the lives of my husband and my marriage.

A life coach could have guided us to make the choice that would have been better for both of us. 

Why you may need a marriage counselor?

There are many reasons why you may need a marriage counselor to help with the trouble in paradise between you, and your spouse. A life coach / counselor can help guide you in thinking rationally about your choices and ultimately in making the right decision best for both the parties.

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Trivial Relationship problems 

Problems in any kind of relationship are inevitable, one cannot avoid them entirely.

However, for modern relationship problems involving a couple in love or bound by the holy band of marriage, life coaches can be a lifesaver

They can help you think rationally about the past, present and future of your relationship. If you feel stuck, they can help guide you through the necessary thoughts and actions you need to think upon to take the relationship forward.

These problems can be trivial matters like you not liking one of their habits, or them not liking parts of your personality, which may lead you both to avoid each other like the drought

Making your relationship stronger

Life coaching is like therapy, wherein you don’t always need to go there for problems with relationships, but you can also go there to focus your relationship more on the positive aspects of the things. 

You might be in a calm relationship now, but if you aren’t happy, then that relationship isn’t fulfilling its purpose.

In any relationship, especially those which we choose by ourselves, we need to make sure that both you and the other party enjoy it thoroughly, or it becomes just another chore to complete in life.

Life is supposed to be enjoyed, not slugged along with, to whichever tune is currently playing.

Checkout: Modern Relationship Problems That Need to be Mended to Build Healthy Relationships

Dealing with partners who cheat

Cheating spouses are also a huge problem in modern times, and a marriage counselor can help you in deciding how to best tackle the issue and approach your partner about it.

Many people will try to hide their cheating and lie to cover up their tracks, not realizing that this only goes on to make the problems worse for both of them.

No one wants their partner to cheat, almost everyone would be happy to correct their ways and even adjust their own personality rather than losing their significant other to cheating problems.

Marriage counselors can help in such a case, by facilitating communication and making sure both parties understand and respect each other’s point of views.

Enhancing trust between you and your partner

It sometimes happens that after the rosy period of your marriage life, the trust in the relationship begins to deteriorate, and if not resolved as soon as possible, it can make your life dry and suck the joy out from your marriage.

It is my job as a life coach to save you from that situation by helping you formulate and implement strategies which can help you enhance the trust between you and your partner.

I do this by helping partners sit and spend time together, and talk about how they may be doing the relationship justice, and how they may correct the things they are doing wrong.

Bringing a new energy to your relationship

After the aforementioned rosy period, even if the partners trust each other, they might not be as invested in each other as they earlier were. In order to help the couples cope through this and renew their love and interest for each other.

This can help refill the relationship with love, concern and genuine curiosity about each other’s lives and days without them. 

A new relationship losing its sheen is nothing to be excessively worried about, all couples experience it at one point or the other.

However, despite knowing that they are losing their interest, if the couple doesn’t act to save the relationship, then there may be bigger issues later on.

How can I, Ritu Singal, help you and your partner in building a better relationship and lives for yourselves?

I, Ritu Singal, have undergone a lot of pain and suffering in life, which have changed my perspective on life. I don’t want to brag, just want to inspire you by telling you that these difficulties pass, and they make you a better person along the way.

However, if you ever feel lonely or unable to handle these situations by yourself, I highly encourage you to seek help and find yourself someone who provides life coaching, like I do.

I can help you with understanding your partner better, maintaining trust and also getting your control of your life and marriage back on track into the hands of you and your partner.

Just like the numerous things I never expected I would do, writing a book that is a compilation of waves of different facets of my life was one of them. I have had the opportunity to educate, empower and guide individuals from different walks of life but now I feel even more grateful to hold an opportunity to share with you the stories of my life, almost all of which tamed me in becoming the person I am today. 

Divided by 32 chapters but united by hope and optimism, writing the book “I Decided NOT To Cry” is a resentment to the strength I have carried out throughout these years.

If you have read some of my blogs, you would have known a part of my life, in fact, my professional life and how I conquered the world of business. Nonetheless, I choose to speak the rest of it now as I re-discover myself.

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I was the third child to my parents and most of my childhood lingered around me being called the most well-behaved child. From having a mediocre pretty decent early childhood days to my mother suffering from a psychological illness, my childhood challenges were like a yacht in high-speed winds. From I learned to navigate through tough times and became a pretty good sailor.

My higher education was based in Chandigarh and studying law was the one adolescent decision I had made and despite the ragging culture which was prominent at that instance, law school became my go-to destination. 

After enrolling for a Master’s in Law, that is when I met my husband for the first time. After having numerous memories, tying the knot and having kids, which seems like a settled family, started to have twists and turns. The chapters in the book are titled respectively in a way that highlights the exact essence of the very same chapter. 

I always believed that business was a straightforward exchange of goods and services for money. However, I lacked an understanding of the mindset and behaviour of business people when it came to finances.

I don’t think it was entirely my fault, as my almost saintly father never exposed me to this side of life. The values he instilled in us prevented me from even considering getting involved in these matters. 

The amount of my non-involvement in the sphere of business was this husk but little did I know that this was going to turn opposite in a few years.

After putting myself up with several challenges with my husband and standing by him even though there were a series of issues he grappled with, my thoughts froze two times. One was when I knew about his illicit affair with another woman and another was when I heard that he had taken his life. 

Again, from my in-laws blaming me for their son’s death to knowing little about how to take forward the business which was in a mess to being there for my kids, I started pondering on the question of   “What can I do?” Gradually I tried to mute these voices in my head, I stepped into the business world and the game started to change.

The process of parenting which I worked on was unconventional which dealt with emotional stability and it instilled great strength in me to deal with life ahead.

There were instances of financial trouble. Consulting the bankers was the first thing I did and this was against my consultant’s opinion. He feared we had lost our credibility with the banks and that it was useless to approach them.

To some extent, even I feared that, but I overruled my fears. I fixed an appointment with the General Manager of our bank and shared the details of my company’s financial status. The financial facet started to improve, and I started to place myself solely in business. 

Yet again from being felicitated with the Women Entrepreneur Award 2011 by ET Now in presence of Mr N.R. Narayana Murthy (Founder Infosys) to being known as one of the best Key Note Speakers by 2021, a lot has changed; a huge part of myself has witnessed growth and I hope to keep the same level of spirit and energy high ahead. 

You will be content to read out more about my story and connect the dot to the title I chose to name it. It sparks to describe Life Beyond Loss: The Wife, The Mother, The Entrepreneur.

Human beings are social. Living together has been a necessity throughout the evolving years. Families have emerged as a classification based on different dimension, but every family has the power to influence behaviours among each other from within.

Being a life coach for over 15+ years now, I have had the experience and opportunity to provide my services to people from all walks of life and with marriage and family counselling, I have known that a major chunk of the development of an individual initiates from the family. Parental behaviour and a person’s relationships with their siblings play a major role in making or breaking their personality development.  

The Benefits Of Family Counseling And How It Works 

In Family counselling, a professional, works with families to help them deal with issues and conflicts they may be facing within their family. The major objective of this is to help family members communicate better, resolve conflicts, and develop coping strategies to deal with difficult situations. 

One of the primary reasons why family counselling is required is to help families deal with conflicts and disagreements, family problems and solutions. Conflicts can arise due to a variety of reasons, including differences in opinions, values, and beliefs, financial stress, and interpersonal issues.

It can provide a safe space for family members to express their feelings and work towards resolving conflicts constructively. Through open communication and active listening, family members can learn to understand each other’s perspectives and find common ground. 

My services have been effective and helpful to my clients as I have focused on making them understand the various types of family therapy and guided them in availing of the services that fit their needs the best. The types of family therapy I provide include: 

– Bowenian: for situations where an individual doesn’t want to involve other family members.
– Structural: focuses on adjusting the family system to bring parents in control.
– Systemic: focuses on subconscious communication and meanings.
– Strategic: brief and direct, with the therapist assigning homework to alter family interactions.

Another reason why family counselling is important is to help families cope with major life changes. This can include a divorce or separation, the death of a loved one, or a major illness or injury.

These types of incidents can have a significant impact on the entire family. Counselling can help family members process their emotions and develop strategies for coping with the changes. 

To propagate through family problems and solutions, marriage and family counselling is a prerequisite for what one can term as right parenting which eventually leads to productive child development. This is how a good bond and constructive relationships can be maintained in the family.  

Counselling can also be beneficial for families who are struggling with mental health issues. This can include depression, anxiety, addiction, or other mental health disorders. A trained professional can provide guidance and support to help family members better understand the mental health issue and develop strategies to manage the associated symptoms.

Family counselling can also help family members learn how to support each other through difficult times and work towards recovery together. 

In addition to these reasons, family counselling can also help families develop better communication skills. What I have found in many of the individuals I provide counselling for is that expressing what they really need with the ones in their family is one major thing to work on and pass through, acting as an ice breaker for many other things.

Family counselling can help family members learn how to express their feelings healthily and constructively, and how to listen actively to others. This can help to build stronger, more positive relationships within the family. 

Who needs family counselling?

The truth is, anyone can benefit from family counselling. It is not just for families who are experiencing major problems or crises. Many families seek counselling as a preventative measure to help them build stronger relationships and improve communication before problems arise. Others seek counselling as a way to address minor issues before they escalate into larger problems. 

Here are some specific examples of situations where family counselling may be helpful: 

– A family is struggling to communicate effectively and resolve conflicts. 

– A family has experienced a major life change, such as a divorce or the death of a loved one. 

– A family member is struggling with mental health issues, such as depression or addiction. 

– A family is experiencing financial stress or other external pressures. 

– A family is going through a difficult transition, such as a child leaving for college or a move to a new location. 

It is important to note that family counselling is not a one-size-fits-all solution. Every family is unique, and the approach to counselling will depend on the needs and goals of the family. An experienced counsellor, one like me can work with the family to develop a customized plan that addresses their specific challenges and provides the support they need to move forward. 

In conclusion, family counselling can help family members communicate better, resolve conflicts, and develop coping strategies to deal with difficult situations. If you or your family are experiencing challenges, consider reaching out and I, Ritu Singal, am just one tap away from travelling with you together on your journey. 

Having kids is a challenge in itself- but when the kid develops into a teen especially, it can be a hundredfold challenge for their parents. However, parents should not think it is impossible to parent a teen in a beautiful, functional adult who makes everyone around them proud.

As a life coach, I, Ritu Singal, have been a mother too, and have also raised two beautiful daughters into the strong girls they are today.

I can, thus, testify that teens are also humans (I know, their behavior and tantrums resemble aliens, but still) who are just rediscovering their identity as they are developing from children to adult, by crossing the fragile bridge of teenage years.

In this blog, let us see how we can handle our teens better, and give them the teenage they deserve.

But first, let us dive into why teenagers behave the way they do.

Why teenagers behave the way they do

Although your teen kids might seem like aliens from another planet you no longer understand, beneath all the riff raff and harsh behavior, your child still lives on, trying to find their identity as an adult.

You must try and understand that the teenager isn’t enjoying it either, its a psychological response to the constant changes battering their body and lives, which changes their personality as well.

The frontal lobe of the teenager undergoes development during these years, which is the part of the brain that controls the personality of the person.

Let us not forget the effect of the hormones, which are probably making your teen feel even more sullen and angry, as they feel that there are changes in their body they can’t even control.

At any point of time, they are doing the best they can, with what they have.

Teens read the emotions of other differently, often in a wrong way

Teens are often different from adults in the way they read the emotions of others.

According to ACT for Youth, as opposed to adults, teens use the amygdala to read emotions, but adults use the prefrontal cortex.

The amygdala is responsible for our emotional reactions, and it can thus lead to teens having wrong notions about the reactions of their parents. In the above given study, the teens often identified different emotions of adults wrongly as being angry.

Checkout: What should parents do to stop teenagers from going to social media?

How to handle your teen?

I hope that the above explanation gives you a glimpse into how the teenage brain thinks and works.

As they perceive others to be angry most of the time, they often reply by retorting back instead of replying back to even the most common remarks, which shouldn’t normally incite the person.

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As a life coach, I, Ritu Singal, advice all parents to deal with the teenage attitude with understanding and compassion. They may be rude, stuck up and even too difficult to handle, but in the end, they are the same sweet children you once raised.

Therefore, a little understanding and compassion can go a long way.

Here are some of the tips I used to improve my parent- child relations when my daughters were teens-

• Try to understand them as much as you can

Don’t let your annoyance with them come in the way of you trying to understand your teen child.

I understand that it is near impossible not to show emotions while dealing with an emotional teen, but arguing with them with your emotions against them will only escalate the situation.

Let’s not forget you are the adults here, so you have to be the bigger person here and try understanding your teen.

If this doesn’t work,

• Give your teenager some well deserved space

A teenager can have multiple things in their mind at the same time, and can be a mixbag of ideas and thoughts. 

They need some space, to sort out their thoughts and ideas and to think about their future. As if teenage years weren’t stressful enough alone, our society has put the pressure of entrance exams on our teens, who now have to make life changing decisions while making sure their future remains bright.

This all contributes to even more stress for them, and the only way you can help them with it is by giving them space should they need it.

However, remember that your teens don’t want to feel lonely, and therefore it becomes important to

• Love and respect the kids in their teens

Many times, parents forget that their teens also have their own lives, and their own dreams.

I have seen so many parents pressure their children to take one exam or the other, for a supposedly better future, however, after the stress of the exam gets to them, they fall prey to mental illnesses like depression and anxiety.

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If they feel neglected, they might move towards bad company, drugs or sex to keep themselves happy, which can stagnate their growth.

As a life coach, I encourage parents to try and keep a bond with their teens that will help them be better for themselves, without any added pressure by the parents.

A dash of love and pint of respect can help your teen feel much better than they might ever feel anywhere else.

How can I, Ritu Singal, a life coach, help you raise your teens well?

Look, I get it. The life of a parent is dificult, but the life of a teen is much more chaotic as they struggle to decide what they want and what they will do in the future, due to the pressure on them by their parents, high school and society.

As a life coach, I can help you understand parenting a teenager the right way.

I was a single parent at the time my kids were teenagers, so I know how difficult it can be to raise a teenager.

But with the right perspective instilled in you along with the best guidance to boot, you can give your teenage child the parenthood they deserve from you.

Are you trapped in a marriage you don’t like to be in?

Are you tired of trying to communicate, but failing, since your partner doesn’t do the same with you, for you?

As an online marriage counselor, I, Ritu Singal, firmly believe that in all kinds of marriages, especially those which face problems on a regular basis, couples counseling can play a big role in helping couples succeed together.

I have helped many other couples like yours battle out the tough phase in their relationship with more support than they could have imagined was possible to get.

Mental coaching is an important part of life, whether it is for marriage or life coaching, and can help you really move ahead in life.

Resolving conflicts in the relationship

Whether you are living with your spouse or someone else, conflicts are unavoidable.

However, you can definitely reduce its frequency in your relationship, or even if not reduce then find out a foolproof way to resolve these fights.

The smartness is not in having zero fights but in resolving those fights as efficiently and pleasantly as possible.

All conflict is an opportunity to further deepen your relationship with each other, and to know more about each other and how the spouse reacts in a difficult circumstance.

This is the reason why solving conflicts peacefully and healthily becomes so important for both you and your partner.

I, a life coach (Ritu Singal), focus on helping people set up foolproof systems, processes and even better communication for the same.

Giving your relationship a new sheen

Every relationship requires new energy from time to time. 

As an online marriage counselor, I, Ritu Singal, help couples like you to give your relationships a new sheen and shine.

In today’s age and time especially, people get bored of each other soon, if nothing new is introduced to them, to encourage them.

A new sheen and shine means your relationship will have more energy, you guys as a couple will be more communicative and you will also enjoy the relationship more.

You may have experienced a growth spurt in your relationship in the initial days, which dulls and stunts as the days go by.

When your relationship is new, you focus more on your partner and enjoy each and every moment with them.

Even conflicts are easily handled, and the relationship feels like smooth sailing. Everything, basically, is all flowers and garden.

However, as time goes by, this energy begins to drop and soon you both may grow tired and frustrated of each other.

It becomes important to seek coaching in that case, in order to renew both your vigor towards each other and to remind yourselves of why you chose to be in a relationship with that specific person and not anyone else.

Mental coaching from me can help you experience that growth spurt throughout the duration of your relationship.

I have coached many couples through the same.

Increasing trust and intimacy in the relationship

Relationships work on trust and intimacy, something which is often overlooked for the duration of the relationship by people.

You may feel like you and your partner love and trust each other enough, but paradoxically, it is this same feeling which gives away that there is a lack of trust in the relationship.

This happens as good couples know building trust is an ongoing process, that you need to keep on working at building your trust, so as to maintain it in your relationship.

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Having more trust means you can live life tension and stress free as you can always count on your partner for support.

Having more intimacy, on the other hand, allows you to confess your deepest and darkest thoughts and feelings with your spouse without the fear of being judged.

Some of you may make the mistake of thinking that marriage counseling is only for people whose relationship with their spouse is in shambles and about to break, however, you are wrong about it.

Marriage and life coaching can help induce a new vigor for life in you and help you and your spouse make the most of your relationship with each other.

Taking out time for each other

One of the major complaints you may have also seen being raised by couples is that they hardly take out time for each other.

Mental coaching can help you sort out your days in such a way that you can easily take out time for each other, no matter how busy you may be.

Taking out time for your spouse in a relationship is crucial, so that you can know each other better and also have time to cherish this relationship with each other.

Most people take relationships for granted, wherein they don’t care about their partner’s needs and are just committed in a relationship for the sake of being with each other.

I hope that is not the case for you, but even if it is, psychological counseling and coaching can help you resolve these issues.

I, as a mental and wellness coach, work together with my clients to help them understand where they may be lacking in their commitments to each other and how they can be a better partner to their spouse.

Why should I, Ritu Singal, be your online marriage counselor?

Couples counseling is a sensitive topic, which requires the experience and maturity of a counselor like me. I have successfully helped many couples like you going through their marriage issues.

I have an extensive array of my own personal experiences to draw from, which makes my coaching experience richer, more diverse and deeper.

I am one of the best life coaches in India, and am focussed on helping my clients, you that is, to help achieve the pinnacle of your potential when in a relationship, with your partner, not in spite of it.

I say this all to instill your confidence in me and my abilities,  which have stood the test of time and have worked for both me and my relationship, which has led me to flourish as an example today for others.