Negative emotions like anger, aggression, defiance, and depression may take over you and your children. These can make your children feel helpless, and you stressed and depressed.
In many parents, such emotions can trigger a furious reaction resulting in shouting, taunting and in extreme cases physical punishment. This behaviour can deteriorate the relationship further.
Most times, there is a genuine gap in emotional needs and understanding of parents and child resulting in misunderstanding, freezing of communication, and lifelong bitterness.
However, if your gaps and conflicts with your child are causing anxiety, stress and family discord, then it is time to seek professional help and guidance.
The following are some common reasons for conflict between parents and children:
- Children refusing to follow instructions
- You do not know how to talk about sensitive matters like opposite gender and puberty
- You are unable to understand children’s emotional needs
- Parents’ power struggles tear children
- Children emotionally blackmailing you
- The children have become too demanding
- High parental expectations
- Pressure on parents to fulfil unreasonable demands
- Addiction to mobile/computer games, or substances
When you listen to your children, pay attention to what they are saying, and involve them in important family decisions, you treat them with respect. When you don’t agree with their choices and decisions, don’t just veto them, but explain its reasons.
If you find it difficult to manage your child’s dreams and actions, then seeking help from professionals is a good idea. A professional can give you support, guidance and tools to handle such situations.
With proper guidance, counselling and coaching, you can expect:
- open and honest communication with your children
- setting and respecting personal boundaries with them
- unconditional forgiveness and acceptance for each other
- value differences in opinion
- treat each other respectfully
- healing of relationships