Role of Guidance and Counseling for Personality Development
Recall the Heroin scene’s grand entrance when he is about to fight the criminals or charm the female Lead. The cinematic experience has been all about showing a larger personality than life and has no regular human flaws. Its charm and attraction have always been to showcase the perfect person WE could become!
That is why, in many professions like performance arts, politics, and even businesses, leaders in their fields try to craft, nurture and build a personality for themselves that is attractive, appealing, and reliable. The best example is the late Steve Jobs of Apple.
Your personality is a set of traits and characteristics that come to define you over some time. These include your emotions, mood, how you respond to situations, and behavioural tendencies you show over a long time to others.
Your personality is more predictable and consistent than one’s immediate mood or emotional reaction, and personality affects both mood and emotions.
Whatever our personality is, it is always leaving a mark on the people we interact with, on situations in how we respond to them, and our future in accepting an opportunity.
That is why it is essential for us to know who we are, our traits and quirks, and how our personalities affect our lives. Our nature may work for us or against us depending on what kind of behavior we show – spontaneous or impulsive, rational or emotional.
Our life experiences and shapes shape our personality – it is like a self-feeding cycle, and it works for or against us. All it takes to interject it with the right kind of stimulus to start cycling in the right direction.
As it drives our thoughts, thinking, and activity, we understand that the experiences we have, and our interpretation of these, will help us become better informed of the impact that every decision we make has on our lives.
Suppose you are a meek or a procrastinating person. In that case, you will postpone the journey to find the answers to problems in the family, at work, in relationships, and, most notably, in your personality.
If you have the courage and wisdom to seek answers, they may sooner or later want to know the real reasons that have brought you to your current state of affairs.
We need regular and continuous positive encouragement and interventions to nurture a positive and encouraging personality that attracts possibilities, opportunities, friendship, and love.
If you think that you need help with improving your personality, then most likely you are right. The feeling of not being able to accomplish something, not having a trusting friend or a loving partner, not having the support of the family that understands, and an overly vigorous exterior are all roadblocks in our way to achieve our full potential.
Our personality is the door, the lock, and the key to understanding what we need for our good. Improvement in nature comes with accepting who we are, without judging, and seeking personality counseling and guidance to resolve serious issues festered for a long time.
Personality development has always been a topic for self-help “Gurus” who have long helped and conned gullible people. These gurus operate with their intrinsic knowledge of the human psyche and how it affects their words, actions, and eventually results. But they have mostly been doing it with a blindfold, meaning without any formal training or scientific background.
With new learning’s, developments, and advancements in the mental health disciplines, neurosciences, and psychology, we now have a science-driven approach to improve personality, correct its disorders, and fill its deficiencies.
A life coach and personality counsellor can help you seek the best in you by helping you understand the distinct personality traits in you and how they affect your life and relations.
With personality development counselling, you can achieve the delicate balance in natural, genetic, and environmental factors that affect your emotions, reactions and tilt them a little every time you practice the scientific tools and techniques suggested.
With a small and consistent change over a long period, you, and the people around you, can see the changes in your personality for the better.
Aspects of Human Personality
The complex human behavior is deeply intertwined with several mechanisms that control what, how, and when we learn about the world and affect it simultaneously.
All people have different abilities, energy, and devotion to observe, retain, recall, and analyse the varied on-going activities and actions around them. This difference is the reason for the different responses we see from people in the same situation.
Personality development has become an essential aspect of counseling and training in psychology and therapy that, generally, takes place in small training groups.
With personality development counseling, a life coach and personality counsellor makes you understand that personal development is the path to enhance self-awareness.
Psychologists and neuroscientists have identified the four broadest categories of personality types that go by different names. We may call them personality types as A, B, C, and D for ease.
- Type A Personality: These people are goal-oriented, rational, focused, risk-takers, and perform best under stress. They always seek the best and want to be on the top. They look for jobs and professions where they can be in a commanding position such as Company CEO, Military officer, Police Officer, Politician, etc.
They are always in a hurry and want all people around them to work as efficiently and as fast as they do. Their need for control and authority is very high and can be damaging for themselves and mostly for others.
- Type B Personality: This category of people is pole opposites of the type A people. They are laid back and relaxed with a calmer view for themselves, others, and life. They are more fun-loving, enthusiastic, and light-hearted. They carry charisma and are ideal people. Type B people are motivators, gurus, spontaneous, and persuasive. They are also too much self-indulgent and many times procrastinate even on essential matters.
The inability to take things seriously and make fun of any situation makes their behavior inappropriate many times. Impulsiveness and emotional outburst define them, and they are quickly bored with anything and seek the newest trends. You find these people in professions such as media and entertainment, customer services, hospitality, etc.
- Type C Personality: These people are very detail-oriented individuals who need to always create a controlled and stable environment around them. Type B individuals are interested in mathematical precision and accuracy, logic, and rationality. They expect others to display the same behavior and are easily disgusted by ‘normal’ people who do not have such high skills. They can’t usually control their emotions and are bothered easily because of the ‘chaos’ in the world around them.
Emotions of other people are not a priority for them as they are all for cold and rational facts. This makes them dependable, detailed, and honest, making them irritable, cold-hearted, self-centered, and indecisive for want of data. Such people are usually found in research labs, engineering divisions, and software companies. They work as pilots, analysts, accountants, and investigators/auditors.
- Type D Personality: These people have a slower speed and are not in a hurry to reach anywhere. They have a much-relaxed pace in their work and their lives in general. These people have a higher need for security, safety, and durability than anything else. If the job’s stability comes from a repetitive task, day in and day out, they are happy doing it. If durability and security in a relationship come by being low and staying in a compromising situation, they usually won’t complain about it and justify it.
With mechanical repetition, they become very skilled at what they do and therefore don’t like the change that much. They create a comfort zone in any situation and have a constant fear of the unknown. These people are found in professions like factory workers, bureaucrats, insurance agents, salespersons, mechanics, librarians, etc.
There is a fifth Type X Personality for the people who have traits from more than one personality type in significant amounts and may show them from time to time or depending on the situation.
A personality counsellor and life coach can identify which personality type you belong to with the help of tests, interviews, and analysis of your thoughts. With this understanding, you also know what flaws you are struggling with and how to correct them.
Personality development counselling is a developmental and strength-based mechanism where the counselor aids the client – an individual, a couple, or a family – through adjustments and transitions.
In personality counselling, India has always been at the forefront with its Verdict knowledge and emphasis on self-knowledge, self-awareness, and self-actualization. The modern life coach and personality counselors trained in scientific tools and techniques can combine ancient wisdom and provide the solutions to even the most conservative of an individual.
Creative personal growth must be the driving force behind finding ways to improve oneself to explore positive ways of changing your habits and find more self-expression and self-acceptance. This also helps in making you more acceptable to others and get along with them well.
Personality development counselling helps you see things from a different perspective, making it possible to grow emotionally, accept, and move forward. It enables you to get rid of harmful or problematic thought processes in a spiral, and don’t let you get stuck in insufferable situations.
Methods of Personal Development
Counselors use a range of methods and tools to increase self-awareness in their clients – such as maintaining a journal, individual counseling, participating in personality development groups, and using the “Johari Window.”
Personality development groups or ‘process groups’ provide a safe space for all participants to freely exchange their understanding of their personality and how it adversely affects them and others. Groups offer an opportunity to practice active and empathetic listening.
Clients’ reflections from such group meetings are used in individual counseling to make SMART goals for bringing a definitive change in personality traits hampering our growth. SMART stands for:
- Specific or Sensible or Significant
- Measurable or Meaningful or Motivating
- Achievable or Attainable
- Relevant or Reasonable or Realistic or Results-oriented
- Time-bound or Timely
A Life Coach aims to help the client write, follow, and achieve their SMART goals with personality development counselling sessions.
Life Coach and Personality Counsellor Ritu Singal
Personality counselors have to deal with great care, as every person has a different personality. Even with a personality type, some of their traits are more expressive and assertive than the others.
Each counseling session is a tightrope walk and has the potential to upstage the whole process at any time if wrong ‘buttons’ are pressed. Working with personality disorders and towards making a person more acceptable to society needs skill, training, experience, and empathy on the part of the counselor.