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Secrets To Create More Balance in Life From Reputed Life Coach

By Life Coach Ritu Singal
18 Jan at 11:44 am
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Many of us find ourselves in great panic. Feel as if a heavy stone is put upon our head and we have to bear its weight the whole life. It is nothing but a load of responsibilities and the trauma associated with it. We have to do so many tasks together like studies, work, office, home, children, and relations. All these are very difficult to manage together. Thinking of so much together makes us depressed and so much confused and irritating.

Have you felt a need for calmness in your life?

Have you ever wished for a fresh mind and peace?

Have you ever felt yourself as if fighting in a circus ring?

If the answer is “yes”; that means the only thing you need is to have a balance in life.

Now, what exactly is the Balance of life?

Ritu Singal says that one is said to live a balanced life when he or she can form a harmony in all aspects of life. It means that when you can handle all the elements of life nicely and your heart or mind is not being pulled forcefully in any particular direction. You feel calm, grounded, clear-headed, and motivated. Balance of life is a natural phenomenon; it is a state of mind and is attained by continuous practice and self-awareness.

Creating a balance is different for every individual. It depends from person to person. Balance need to be made in two elements of life:

Internal – Mind, Heart, and Health.
External- Work, Social, Family, and fun.

How to create balance in your life?

When you feel that things are not working and want control over your life or we can say to establish a balance between different aspects of your life, follow the following tricks

Acknowledge your present situation: Become aware of what you are doing. Don’t get carried away in the flow of life. Do what is necessary and meaningful following your priorities. Becoming aware will help you to seek out things and help you live a purposeful life and strike a balance in different activities of your life.

No phones: Phones always keep you busy and occupied. It is advisable to keep it off for some hours of the day. Disconnecting yourself is essential as it makes your brain run faster and enables you to spend time with friends and family.

Cut it off: If there is an overflow of work and there are numerous tasks to be done it becomes difficult to establish a balance between all. Thus, one has to decide about the priorities of your life and say no to non-essential things so that you can concentrate on essential things and do everything peacefully.

Say “No” to negativity: Pessimistic people and their talks always take you backward in life. They create fear and tension in the mind. This leads to more confusion and irritation in the minds of the people. They lose their balance and are unable to make the right decisions in life. Thus keep a distance from such kinds of people. Also, keep on monitoring your thoughts. Any kind of negative vibe must be wiped off. Spend time with positive, motivated, and energetic people.

Have some leisure time: Spend time with yourself. Spend some time alone, sit back, and relax. Do what you like the most- reading books, listening to music, Painting, etc. It will help you to recognize yourself. When one is completely relaxed and fresh he can think better and have a broad vision. Thus can make a better decision and manage things properly. It is crucial in lowering stress, increasing happiness, and encouraging creativity.

Spend time with family: Family and relationships act as a major healer. Spending time with them makes you feel more happy and complete. Spend time with your love, play with your children, and Serve your parents. It will help you to know them and relax.

Improve your health: Physical fitness is very important for a relaxed and happy mind. Do yoga, exercises, gymming, and meditation. Our health affects the quality of work and our focus as well. Physical fitness aids in working with more energy and dedication and thus increases productivity as well. Good health is equal to a more happy and satisfying life.

Have fun: Boring and monotonous life is very frustrating. Being occupied by work and responsibilities the whole day makes a man irritating and tired both physically as well as mentally. Some amount of fun and adventure is necessary for relaxation as well. Dine out, Go on a coffee, explore the world, meet friends, watch a movie, etc. Do anything that can give you a belly laugh and thus makes you feel happy and relaxed within.

Become aware: There are many online and face to face courses that teach you how to train your mind. Attend motivational seminars and listen to the gurus which can enlighten your mind and life as well.

Despite knowing the importance and the ways to achieve it we are seldom unable to strike the right balance in our life. It may be due to several reasons as illustrated hereunder:

Reasons, why you are living, might be feeling off-balance

When you don’t know what balancing is:

There is no definite formula for how to simplify your life. This differs from person to person. Balancing is an art, its feeling is different for all depending upon the responsibilities, job, age, hobbies, and relationships.

For this focus on your thoughts and make them revolve around this concept. Imagine how life would be if you were more satisfied and happy. Imagine how you want your life to be and how a balanced life would look like. This helps you get a clear picture of what balancing is and what has to be done to attain what you are striving for.

Figure out what balance is and how it can be achieved. Think, rest, and meditate.

When you don’t have a good will-power

Unnecessary distractions must not be able to move you. One must be clear on priorities that will help to achieve the goal of life. Also, set personal boundaries that must not be crossed by anyone; not even yourself. Discipline in life is necessary for the attainment of goals. No plan and formula can be worked out successfully if one does not have self-discipline and a strong will-power.

To strike balances in life first learn to train your mind and do the tasks that go following your priority. Distractions will take you away from the goal and cause confusion and anxiety.

When you are not consistent with your actions

Being consistent is doing or following the routine that was established to achieve the desired goal. Sticking with the help of the established practice in mastering over the things and also strike the balance between all the tasks related to your daily life.

Shifting or changing the course of action, again and again, leads to confusion and hassle. This often leads you to off-balance and takes you away from your target.

Lack of planning

Planning is an essential way to achieve balance in life. Outlining the week or day beforehand will increase your productivity and achieve the desired results on time. Planning can be done for work-life, studies, related to family goals, or any other task. Planning minimizes the unproductive time and also reduces real-time panic and losses associated with it.

The planning must encompass everything- appointments, projects, social/relationship time, time for self-care, etc. Thus planning aids in the easy achievement of targets and establishes a balance between different responsibilities and roles to be played throughout the day.

No time for self-care

Pampering yourself is very important to feel happy and confident. Everyone must take out time from their busy schedule for self-love and self-care. A fit body is essential to work for the whole day. Also, self-care is important to maintain your looks- eyes, hair, and skin. It also includes nurturing your mind and soul.

This makes you feel confident and gives a positive attitude towards life. Thus without self-care one gets depressed and feels inferior. Low energy enables him to work with full dedication. Thus achieving a balance in life and peace becomes difficult.

This story helps you to understand this concept better

Once there was a woman. she was very polite and decent. Married in a joint family she was overburdened with work and responsibilities. Along with this, she had to go to the office and focus on her career as well. She was depressed and found it very difficult to do everything together. She had to play so many roles together. As a result, her health degraded and her looks also got average. She began to have headaches and grew mentally sick.

Then once she attended a session on how to attain balance in life and tips to live a happy life. She read many books regarding this. She understood the meaning of balance and the way to achieve balance in life. She practiced all the ways to achieve it. She did meditation and became aware of her present life. She made a blueprint of what she wanted from her life.

She dreamt of a happy and peaceful life. With more self-care and broad vision, she was able to balance her personal and professional life. She started staying happy and satisfied. She became mentally and physically fit as well. She again started looking beautiful and performed very well at work as well.

Thus plan your life and strive to achieve balance in life. This will impart to you all the happiness of life.

Advantages of living a balanced life

Improve your mood: Once you have a balanced life, you feel more content and happy. It acts as a mood buster. Negative thoughts and depression just go away from your life forever. Anger and frustration are released out. Thus, overall it imparts you peace of mind and happiness from within.

Improve health: Balance in life is a result of positive thinking, deep thought, and harmony in day to day activities. When you are mentally free, you can concentrate on the different aspects of your health too. Less stress reduces the risk of high BP and heart problems as well. Thus it leads to overall perfect health.

More energy: When everything is planned and perfect, life seems to be so beautiful. Balance in life makes you more productive and helps in the timely attainment of goals. When you are healthy and have a clear and fresh mind, you become more energetic and active.

Healthy social life: Everyone wants to spend time with positive and happening people. Their attitude and confidence attract more friends and family towards them. They often act as a role model for many. Thus social relations foster and you become more and more happy and successful.

More self-confidence: When you can strike the right balance in life, you become more confident. A man with a healthy and fit mind, body, and soul are sure to have a boost in confidence.

Achievement of career aims: A man who can strike a balance in life is bound to achieve all the desired aims of life. He becomes successful in all aspects of life. Nothing is impossible for the one who lives a balanced life.

Conclusion

Stop saying that I’m busy. Busy. Busy !! In this technological world, everyone is hijacked by computers, mobiles, and social media. Moreover, the stress of family and personal duties is also increasing. There is a lot to be done in very little time. The mind is always preoccupied which leads to stress and conflicts. Time can be given to everything and everyone if balanced properly. Learn managing yourself. Be mindful and think rationally. Learn to love yourself. Living a balanced life is key to a happy and peaceful mind.

Many of us find ourselves in great panic. Feel as if a heavy stone is put upon our head and […]

Ways For Being Content With What You Are

By Life Coach Ritu Singal
16 Jan at 6:36 am
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We all are god’s children. He has created the universe and all the human beings and creatures. All men are not equal. He has blessed everyone with different qualities. We must trust in his creation and should feel content with what we are bestowed upon.

We often feel jealous of other people around us. We look at their clothes, accessories, luxury, and success in career; studies etc. and compare with what we have. This does nothing but makes us sometimes feel incompetent and depressed. This exerts a bad impression on our mind and thus affects our mental well being as well.

Shakespeare once said- “ I cried when I had no shoes, so I stopped crying when I saw a man without legs.”

Also our great leader Mahatma Gandhi had always preached that whenever you feel that you have something less or feel inferior look at the people who are below you. You will feel grateful and lucky. God has bestowed you with so many qualities which others don’t have. We must focus on the good within us and forget the rest.

This little trick will change everything surely.

What does feeling content actually mean?

Have you ever tried to be grateful for what you have?

Have you felt the sense of complete and satisfied?

Feeling content is a feeling that comes from inside. It comes from within our heart. It is feeling satisfied and happy with what you have. It not just gives you enormous self confidence but also motivates to move forward in the right direction.

We are blessed with a wonderful body, the organ system, the senses but many of the people don’t have this also. Imagine your body without any of the organs or a missing sense. And even with this mis-happening they manage to smile and live so why not we? We are blessed and we must be thankful for that.

Not feeling content has many bad repercussions also like

Hinders growth: Being content with what we do and what he has makes you feel motivated to do the work we are doing. It does not all mean that you must start improving yourself. Try to improve and grow but meanwhile learn to be content with what the situation is.

Mental wellness: Mental wellbeing is important for normal and prosperous life of a person. Feeling of jealousy makes you feel depressed and mentally sick. It leads to chronic headache and sleeplessness also sometimes. This hinders your overall growth also sometimes. Thus we must be content with what you have.
Bad relations: If you are in a bad mood it ultimately affects your personal lives as well. We often disseminate our anger and frustration on our near and dear ones. Anger is our biggest enemy. They become the victim of our wrath and ignorant behaviour. If you are not feeling satisfied and happy from within; you show it out also. This worsens your relationship with your kith and kin and disturbs the family life as well.
Bad health: When we are not happy and content we start ignoring our health too. Proper sleep and mental well being is necessary for good physical health as well. A healthy mind resides in a healthy body. Therefore if we don’t keep our minds balanced it may lead to different types of health diseases like diabetes and blood pressure issues. Thus learn to feel content and satisfied and also be happy to live a sustainable and healthy life.
Social distancing: The nature of a man is highly impacted by his thoughts and mental status. A man who is not content with his belongings means he is feeling jealous looking upon other people and their achievements. Thus he starts behaving immorally or rudely in social life too. It leads to fewer friends. Everyone likes to stay away from such pessimistic people.

Accept yourself, the person and situation as they are.

We often start to change ourselves and be like the people who we think are better than us. This is nothing but just a waste of mental and physical energy. We must start to feel peace at what we have and about the situation which is beyond our control.

One has to be more compassionate and keep patience. In the race of getting more than other; we often forget ourselves. We forget the joy of celebrating the present. And our whole life is wasted just in tension and comparisons.

The following illustration will help you understand the concept better

There was a person named George. He was addicted to junk food and fast food, and was overweight and unhealthy as well. He bought too many things on impulse, owned too much clutter, and was deeply in debt and struggling to make it to the next payday. He was unhappy with who he was, wanted to change desperately, tried a thousand different programs and books.

He was always worried as he was missing out on exciting things, and wanted so much to be out doing the fun things everyone else was doing. He was always kept on changing the way he did things, because it seemed everyone else had a better system or tools. He tried to do everything which everyone across him did so that he could achieve his goals and be happy like them.

And as he learned to be content, here was what changed:

He learned to be happy with healthier food, with less food, and his health improved and waistline shrunk. He relied on a good book, spending time with people he loved, going for a nice run … and his debt began to be reduced as he learned he didn’t need to spend money to enjoy. He learned to be happier with who he was, and what he was doing. So he no longer needed to try all kinds of new techniques that were done by others. He became happy with himself and spent leisure time, with those around him, and with what he had — and so didn’t need to strive to change everything. Letting go of goals helped him to simplify things and actually concentrate upon himself with patience. Thus he was self confident and motivated than ever before

How to be content with the present

Cultivate Awareness

The first step towards it is to become aware of your present i.e. think of the things you already have. Think of what you have achieved and the relations you have cherished. Living in the present not only makes us joyous but also be content and satisfied. ‘Acknowledging the present means being grateful for what you have. It can be done by making a list of things for which you are grateful. This practice must be done in the early morning. Write at least 5 things daily for which you are thankful.

Few illustrations for which you can be thankful are:

Thanks for the beautiful morning and this life.
Thanks for the fit body and all the organs and senses that are working perfectly.
Thanks for whatever you have achieved in your studies and career
Thanks for the family relations you are blessed with
Thanks for the Job or business you are pursuing.

The gratitude practice has been preached by many scholars and intellectuals. According to them being grateful is the key to happiness. You have to understand that nothing is permanent. All will pass. Instead of resenting one must look forward in life and make the blueprint of success.

Stop thinking negatively

Just stop thinking of any negative thing, situation or person. Ignore everything that makes you feel down or incompetent. Just concentrate on the good side of the thing and situation. Reverse your thinking the moment it goes on a negative track

Find the good in you

You just have to concentrate on the little things that give you joy. Think about the pleasant memories . Find the things within you that you are happy with. Explore your qualities and the positive things within you that make you different from others. In short you have to explore yourself and feel happy about everything you have.

Accepting what you can’t change

After becoming aware of what you already have; the next step is creating a broader vision and accepting all the people, situations and things as they are. Try to improve yourself and adapt to the changes but not out of jealousy or comparison but out of self curiosity and personal goals. Do everything you like but for yourself. Try to change and improve yourself but not to copy anyone else but for personal happiness and goals.

Some things are beyond our control. They are pre decided by the divine and we have to trust the almighty. This does not mean that you have to give up and be passive. Improvement is the need of the hour and continuous changes are necessary to sustain on this planet. But whatever you do must be guided by a desire and a goal to be unique. It must not be aimed at becoming someone else.

Practice Patience

Patience means letting the things unfold in their own manner and on their own time. Its no use to become impulsive. Becoming too impulsive and rushing towards something can lead to wrong decisions sometimes. One has to keep patience and trust on the pace of growth.

Start embracing the moment and trust that whatever you need or desire shall come at its time. If you start keeping patience and believing in yourself and stay happy everything will start to fall in the right place and you will be there where you desired.

Assume that everything is perfect.

When you assume things to be perfect: they will have to get perfect. Change your thought process. It is your thinking that decides your actions and the future. Start loving yourself. Stop criticizing your present. Tell yourself that you are perfect. Be happy with what you have.

What happens when you start being content:

Feeling grateful: The feeling of content is associated with lots of positivity and happiness. This makes a man thankful to God and the universe. The feeling of gratitude is the key to more success and empowerment. A man with a positive attitude is sure to achieve great heights. Not only on his career front but he had sweet relations with everyone around.
Growth and success: Feeling of contentment and happiness encourages one to work with more dedication and focus. His productivity increases as he can do all things with a fresh mind and full self confidence.
Boost of self image: When you start living a satisfied life and stop criticizing yourself ; your self image and confidence gets a great boost. This helps you build up plans of self improvement and success in your own style and perspective that suits you.
Good health: Being happy from within makes you mentally fit and emotionally strong. It in turns helps you to stay fit and saves you from many types of disease that are caused due to hypertension. Thus you get an overall good health and a fit life.
Good relationships: If you are happy and learn to be content you can be a better person, a good partner and a good parent as well. Your wrath reduces and you become more adjustable and active. Thus your personal relationships also improve as well.
Relax: you reduce the major part of your thinking by cutting off the negative thoughts; thus you are actually totally free, happy and relaxed. You start getting time for productive things and feel yourself free mentally as well emotionally. You are in a relaxed state of mind and thus you can also manage your routine and tasks in a better way.

Conclusion

Be happy with the little you have. There are people with nothing that still manage to smile .Just let go off the fear and concentrate on what is already here. Take a long breath and smile .This process of thinking might not be easy for some; but it is not difficult. With patience and continuous practice we can fully get control over our thoughts and start living a life full of contentment and happiness.

‘Be content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.’ ~Lao Tzu

We all are god’s children. He has created the universe and all the human beings and creatures. All men are […]

Here’s How You Can Make Your New Year’s Resolution For 2021 Possible

By Life Coach Ritu Singal
11 Jan at 9:51 am
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Well, New year with new dreams, hopes, ideas, and explanations for everyone for us. But we build all these things on the foundation of one thing that is resolution, and new year’s resolution is something that is more common than anything you can think of. We all start the very first day of every year with a new or sometimes the same resolution, but only a few can successfully continue working on that all year long. With the help of this piece of information, I will help you understand the true significance of your new year’s resolution and the power of your one will so you can make 2021 your year and achieve whatever you dreamed about.

Get Past To 2020

We can not talk about new year resolution 2021 or a new beginning without discussing the last year, i.e., 2020. Yes, the year that shook the entire world and changed how we live our lives. COVID-19 has changed every single life on this plane since last year. When the government imposed lockdown in the entire country because of the increasing cases of the virus, we all have to stop our daily life routine and get prisoned in our homes so we can avoid this pandemic effectively.

However, time was not pleasing. The lockdown period was very hurtful, not only in terms of economic aspects but also in emotional aspects too. Since March 2020, many people lost their jobs, many were homeless, and we have lost too many people that is truly sad. And this is the reason we all were so much over with 2020 and wanted it to end soon so we can have a fresh start with 2021.

Focusing On Goal More Than Resolution

When first the Covid were here, and we were locked in our houses, then we also made some resolution whether it is about our health or reading books and working on a new skill. However, those were also washed away like with a long wave of time; besides, they prove it that only 1% of people can stick to their resolution and work through it. So, today I will not talk about a resolution with you but about the goals.

The new year goals are the core foundation of your success that keeps you motivated with your resolution and makes you achieve everything in your life. I have seen people accomplish their goals even during the lockdown period, whether it is about fitness, professional growth, or learning new skills like cooking. Not even the people but also the companies or groups have achieved tremendous success using their alternative plans during the lockdown or Covid period, targeting the people’s needs and helping with their situation. This was all possible only because they could set their goals and work hard toward their goals.

In the past, I have witnessed several people complaining about not being able to stick to their new year resolution and ultimately lost their foals ending up the same way. Using different methods and techniques, I helped them to strengthen their will power for continuing their resolution and hard work.

Working Towards The End Goal Matters

Let me tell you a small story about a kingdom where every king can rule for five years, and after completing the five years, it makes him go into the forest. The king, with all his attire with an elephant ride, made to go into the forest with no resources rather than surviving on the wild animals from the jungle. When a king was being prepared to go to the forest he was anxious, and suddenly someone asked him who should be the next king now, and then he took someone’s name who was very smart. But when people go to him with the news, then the person is denied the offer of becoming the king for five years.

However, after a long discussion, the people of the kingdom could convince him to become the king and that the condition of going to the forest after that. So, he took the place of the king in the kingdom and started his tenure. But unlike other kings, he started focusing on the forest, too, along with his other duties as the kind. During his tenure, he first visited the kingdom and saw there were several wild animals and the skeletons of previous kings. So, he started with cleaning the forest and then shifted all animals from there to somewhere else. After that, he started establishing other facilities there, like agriculture and building homes to convert that forest into a place where one can survive.

Over five years, he built a very great palace in the forest so any person can easily live there having nothing. The day when he was prepared to go to the forest, he seemed happy, and by seeing him happy, other people of the kingdom were confused and asked why are you happy as all the previous kings were sad about this. He was happy because he knew that he didn’t have to fight with animals in the forest or worry about the food for survival as it has everything now. So, with this story, we came to know about how the last king worked for his survival during the king’s life instead of enjoying all the pleasure of being king.

Similarly to the story, we all have when we are young and have resources to make our future great with hard work. Instead, we choose to waste those things and enjoy life with short-term pleasures. This Is the reason most people do not achieve in their life what they dream about. Let me tell you about myself; recently, I also took the resolution of my fitness, which used to be the least important thing for me. I am 53 years old, and I used to have excuses such as I do not have time for this or I can not wake up early in the morning, but eventually, I gave up all the excuses and started doing some workout at home. Once I was determined, I could do everything from counting my steps to having a clean diet along with some mild workout, and then I also completed a marathon in 2020.

How To Make Your New Year Resolution Stronger?

Here are a few things you must consider while taking a resolution so you can stick to it until you achieve your goal

Now I am going to share some essential things with you you must consider as they will help you in perfectly executing your action daily and assist you in moving towards your goal.

Plan

For anything to happen or if you wish to do something, you need a plan, so you know how to lay down your actions. Suppose you are in your car and drive, but if you do not know where to go or the destination, then there is no point in driving. You need to put down your goals on paper and come up with a new year plan of how you can achieve them. With this, you will make sure that you are going in the right direction without wasting your hard work.

Smart Goal

Make sure you choose your goal very wisely and pick the goals that are practically possible for you. It is also necessary to choose some new year goals that are achievable in your life.

Wasting major time in minor works

This means you are wasting a lot of time on minor tasks such as sending mail or text while you are putting in quick time insignificant tasks such as project work or personal tasks. You need to manage your time very effectively. Try to use all the technologies and resources very wisely so you can save your time for priority tasks.

Put down your goals

It is very helpful to write your goals, and it will be more beneficial if you make a graphical representation of that. In case you are planning to lose a certain weight, then try to get a picture and write your goal and put it in front of you so they will motivate you every day to achieve it.

Trustable partner

You can also get an accountability partner who will keep you going on those days whenever you feel like giving up.

Achieve your goals silently

Do not be very loud about your new year goals; rather, go for it in silence. I am sure you heard about the quote, work in silence, and let the success make all the noise.

Do not procrastinate

You need to understand that you can not achieve your goal by putting in the hard work for the next day. Make sure you start now as it is the only way to get closer to your goal every single day, so do not wait for a certain day to start the work.

Get out of your comfort zones

In order to make all your dreams come true, you need to come out of your comfort zones. Be a little comfortable being uncomfortable as nothing is gonna happen well in your comfort zone.

The depressing part is that with their January 1 resolutions, many individuals do not excel. But that’s because these midnight resolutions look more like a social pressure-an effort to look healthier, mitigate shame, or meet others’ expectations. For starters, gaining weight is amongst the most common New Year’s resolutions and one that individuals seem to perform poorly at. Part of the cause is where it comes from: it sometimes comes from internal or external coercion, as opposed to a purpose that might be naturally valued, such as having more fitness or stamina.

Why New Year Resolutions Fails?

We find that they encounter deeper satisfaction when individuals are committed to giving to someone than when their priorities are more self-oriented. Experiments, for instance, show that doing something compassionate for others enhances your optimistic outlook and energy, particularly though you never meet the recipient.

Most importantly, I conducted a report on what we term the “integrative span” of individuals. I found that as your concentration of interest and caring gets broader, your satisfaction improves. “The less comfortable you are likely to be, if your primary concerns and interests are specific and selfish, just about “me and the individuals really close to me,” versus “my family and my community,” versus “the wider world and everyone and everything. In comparison, a wider sense of treatment and empathy for others predicts better well-being.

How do we make any resolution more likely to stick?

There have been some core elements of achievement in every resolution you might make, outside the emphasis of your objectives. Second, make absolutely sure that your goal is one that you genuinely support, that you are absolutely behind and that you care for. An achievable target is often something that is not hypothetical, such as “improving my health,” but real, such as “increasing my daily step count” or “drinking fruit juice at lunch rather than sugary soda.” The above targets are transparent and achievable in a way that can never be an ambiguous global resolution. The very next step, if it has a clear goal, is to make a practical strategy for how and where it can be implemented.

Just as significant evidence suggests that the more you can make the whole thing fun and “intrinsically motivated” to reach your resolution, the more so you can persist. For instance, a strategy to raise your step count may involve a stroll with a good friend every day, which will both accomplish your step goal and fulfil the needs of connectedness. You would be more likely to move on by choosing an experience that also takes you to your target and that you genuinely like, or at least not find aversive.

Eventually, sustainable resolutions are typically based on ideal obstacles. It would feel disheartening to set the bar too high and contribute to disconnection. Bear in mind that the safest approach is to set small incremental objectives for virtually every long-term target, not “I’m going to climb Everest,” but more “I’m looking to bring these first few steps towards base camp.”

Well, New year with new dreams, hopes, ideas, and explanations for everyone for us. But we build all these things […]

Parent and Child Relationship: All you need to know

By Life Coach Ritu Singal
08 Jan at 5:24 am
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Many parents think that the end of pregnancy is the end of the most laborious part of parenthood. What they don’t know is that it is the beginning of a very crucial phase of life, which is developing a good parent-child relationship. Apart from all the roles that you play professionally and personally, the parenting process becomes the most important of them all. Parenthood will and should take over all your other aspects.

A few days back, a family came to attend a counseling session with me. The parents had a 16-year-old boy. They thought that their son has gone out of their hands and that he does not obey anything they say. The health of the father had started declining because of the irresponsible behavior of the son. As they started counseling with me, I realized the problem behind all this was the generation gap.

The parents were still following the orthodox methods of parenting where they wanted their son to study all day, perform well at school, avoid social gatherings, and all such activities. The father always shouted at him, thinking this the method of handling stubborn kids. This method of the father had made his son least bothered about anything.

When I counseled the father and asked him to be polite and a bit more open to his son’s lifestyle, he agreed. In the next session, I asked their son how things have been with his dad lately, he said, “Suspiciously well!”

He was surprised to notice his dad was no more shouting at him. Gradually they all started adjusting to each other’s way of living. The son started performing well.

On the third session, when I asked his dad how his health is, he said on a scale of 1-10, my health has reached 5, from 3 in just two sessions. They were very satisfied and happy with the counseling.

This incident made me think that most parents give the best of parenting when their kids are young, but as the kids grow up, they start getting away from their parents. The healthy parent-child relation should last forever and not just for a phase. I know each one of us tries hard to be the best parent to their child, and I know we give our best in the process.

A Healthy Parent-Child Relationship

As a parent, you give a perfect start in life to your child. You nurture them, protect them, and always guide them towards the right path. In a way, you prepare your child to be more and more independent as they grow.

This parent-child relation will lay the foundation for your child’s life choices, personality, and overall development. Even after your child grows into an independent being, there are certain things that you should do to help them.

Why is a parent-child relation critical?

The relation that you form with your child is the relation they will carry forward in their lives. Loving parents or a single parent will create loving children, and these children will bear the legacy of forming kind relations with others in the future. It is how a parent-child relationship is crucial to be maintained from infancy to adulthood of your kids.
If the relationship between you and your child is a loving relationship, then the child will always feel secure about sharing his feelings, problems, and challenges openly with you. In this way, the child will not hide things from you or try to find peace in strangers.
A good family relation creates a child who is emotionally, physically, and mentally well developed. The child remains optimistic as long as he knows his parents are by his side. If you are a single parent family, your responsibility towards your child doubles. You have to make sure your child does not feel a void in the family.

How to build a robust parent-child relationship?

Now that you know how important it is to create a healthy parent-child relationship, let’s learn some ways in which you can do so:

1) Start even before the child arrives

The mother of the child develops a bond with the child even before it is born. The father flourishes the bond as soon as the kid arrives. Even before the child is born, you have to start preparing to be parents. Set your priorities right, make all the necessary lifestyle changes, and set a schedule where you spend most of your time with your kid. It is very crucial to give complete attention to a kid during his infancy to toddler age.

2) Be available

Nothing makes children feel worse than seeing their parents being unavailable for them. Your kid will always look up to you from the very beginning to feel safe and secure. Make sure you are invariably available to them. Do not make excuses to miss their school functions or ceremonies. Make them a priority.

3) Eat meals together

It may sound very cinch, but eating meals together is an essential step in a healthy parenting process. Mealtime is the best time when families converse, discuss their days, and share their thoughts. Make it a habit from the very beginning, even if however busy a person is, they have to take out time to eat dinner together.

4) Trust your child

Getting too involved and interfering too much in their life will lead to distance between you guys. You need to trust your kids, their activities, and more importantly, you have to trust your given morals. If you know you have raised the child right, then there’s no need to blame them now and then. Also, your child should trust you equally. Being trustworthy is very important. If your child trusts you with their secrets, then it is your responsibility of not breaking their trust.

5) Parenting counseling

Even if you have tried all you could, but could not build a good parent-child relationship, then you should try parenting counseling. This counseling will help you learn how to raise your child in the best manner. Many times people don’t have a clue about how to raise a child and steadily feel their relations getting sour. If you are going through the same, then parenting counseling will help you tremendously. The counselor will understand your situation, expectations, and then will guide you to form a healthy relationship.

Final thoughts

Parenting is hard and can sometimes even get to your nerves. When you see your child becoming the person you never wanted them to, it makes you doubt your efforts. A healthy parent-child relationship is to be formed in the very initial stages and should be carried throughout life. It may take longer than you expect, but upbringing is a very gratifying job. If you try your best now, you shall see the rewards later, and then you won’t deplore any part of the parenting process.

Why Do We Need to Fix Top Priorities In Life

By Life Coach Ritu Singal
08 Jan at 5:23 am
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Have you ever felt confused?

Have you ever asked yourself “What I’m doing here”?

Am I on the right path?

Will the things done by me lead me to achieve the goal of my life?

Time is running very fast. Time does not have hair at his backside thus we cannot pull it back once it is passed. On the other hand, work to be done and tasks are many. We often waste our time doing unwanted things that are taking us away from our goal.

It is called sleepwalking when you try to do so many things together and none of them is going to serve your purpose. It’s a sheer waste of time and energy. Ritu Singal says that one has to fix his or her goal and outline the priorities of life first, to live a meaningful and happy life.

I have a very interesting story to help you understand the concept-

Once a very interesting person came to her. His name was John and he wanted to become a successful film producer. As he saw the successful people around him, he used to note their routines and activities. He saw that some people used to work for 12 hours a day and even 7 days a week. To copy them he too started working day and night. He indeed got success and started getting films but not as much as he desired. The rate of progress was slow despite the number of efforts he had put upon it. Also, he was feeling depressed and restless. He was not at all happy.

After listening to his story and knowing about his hobbies and routine it was discovered that he was a family loving person who used to love time with his family. But due to work stress, he started to ignore them. To sum up he had ignored the priority of his life- His family and relations. This made him incomplete and was the biggest hurdle in his success.

She advised him to fix the priorities of his life and do the things which makes him happy and take him closer to his goal and asked him to spend some time with his family too apart from working. Now he started living a balanced life. He spent family time as well as worked with full dedication for the rest of the time.

As a result, his business flourished and he became a very successful and famous film producer. He not only achieved what he wanted but was happy from the heart. He was now a confident man who lived the life he desired because he was able to set a line of priorities that run parallel with the achievement of his target.

First of all, let’s start with

What is a Goal?

The goal is the desire or the ultimate aim of your life. It is remarked as the destination for which you are going to work and run for the next part of your life. It is the target at which we have to point our proverbial arrow.

After setting the goal the next step is fixing the priorities of life so that you can achieve your target as soon as possible as desired.

What is the priority?

A priority is anything which is always given the first number in our to-do list. The act which takes us closer to our target. The priority is such that it helps you walk on the desired path that helps you take to the destination you always wished.

“A priority is the concern, interest or desire that comes before all others.”

Management of time becomes easier If you have defined priorities clearly. We have so many things to do that at the end of the day we end messed up and confused. Priorities in life are different from person to person and can be related to any aspect of life like social, work or relationships.

Priorities help to outline our day to day tasks and activities. IT makes life simpler and fixes what should be done and what has to be ignored. It thus helps in decision making. If your vision is clear your words and action will be always supportive.

A man who has not yet fixed his priorities and goal is bound to do contradictory things that are valueless. Through this article, I would like to help you recognize your goal and setting priorities.

What is the difference between goal and priority?

A goal is an ultimate milestone that everyone wants to achieve. Thus, the goal is a long term target that a person strives for. Whereas priority is ranking the activities of your life following their importance. This makes us more focused and accountable. Also, we feel so satisfied and happy in realizing that we are making progress towards our goal. Thus, Goal is a bigger term- a tangible result which can be achieved by a dedicated and focused person who has fixed his priorities rightly and is thus living a happy life from within as well.

You may be wondering why is setting priority so important?

Priorities help to:

-Make the correct decision of what has to be done and what not

-Live a meaningful life that has an aim and as well as a process to achieve the aim.

-Achieve goals

-Build self-confidence

-Set an example of how to live a balanced and happy life

We often feel frustrated and complain of feeling low or disheartened. Life coach says that it happens when your subconscious mind is not happy with the things going on in your life. Due to the lack of knowledge, we are not able to listen to our subconscious mind.

How to prioritize work when everything’s important?

List of Priorities

When we start working on a goal but forget the real priorities of our life we often become restless and depressed. Thus we need to set our priorities and then work on our goal so that we can give up our 200% for the achievement of the desired result. Now I would like to illustrate some types of priorities so that you can get a more clear picture of this concept. Here is a list of priorities –

Family: A family is like the backbone of your life. No family life and no love always makes a man feel incomplete and restless. Family is needed to share your happiness as well as your sorrows and nobody else can better support you then your family. Family always has to rank first in the list of your priorities. One who Is blessed with the love of family will surely feel real happiness and success.

A man bad at his home and relations often ends up depressed and all messed up.

Friends: They are not a part of our biological family but they are no less important to us. A friend in need is a friend indeed is an old but true saying. They act as great motivators and mood busters. They help us take a break from our busy lives which is very important to regenerate energy. For some people, friendship is above all relations and they can do anything for their friends. They hold their friends on priority.
Aim of your life: set a mission and be very desperate about it. Fix your activities and habits such that they are in perfect sync with your aim. You ought to prioritize things and people who help you achieve your aim. As time is limited and we need to do much to achieve our goal one has to be focussed and serious. Wasting time on not so important things can make you regret your whole life.
Money: I heard once “ Money can’t buy you happiness, but it buys you a car to sit in and weep” !! Very true. Money is very important to fulfil the basic amenities of life and live the desired life. Some people have the aim to become a millionaire and have all the luxuries of life. So it differs from person to person. Money should not be everything but it is an important thing without which life is impossible. How much priority is given to money depends upon the mindset and desire of the person. Social security and safe future are very important for a satisfied and confident life
Health: Even if you have achieved your goal it is of no importance if you do not have good health to enjoy its benefits. Thus a fit and healthy body are very important. It is very crucial as bad health robs all your happiness and hampers your productivity as well. It is very important to be energetic and active. One must prioritize the health and indulge in exercises, yoga, Meditation and a nutritious diet
Fun: “all work no play make Jack a dull boy”

Thus monotonous and boring life is a sin. Everyone must have a factor in his or her life. This keeps the spirit of happiness and liveliness alive. Too much fun may stop your growth but enjoyment in balanced amounts is important for a happy and healthy life and thus ultimately in the achievement of the set targets. If you are fresh; you can better focus on your targets and the means to achieve them. Therefore must be given someplace in the priority ranking tool.

The personal priority of everyone is different and one has to fix them accordingly. Here I would try to enumerate what should be done to choose priorities

How to choose life priorities?

Vision: Firstly get a clear vision of

What do you want to achieve?

Where do you see yourself after a few years?

Firstly set a goal of what you are longing for. Exercises like Meditation and listening to the intellects can best help you in making a clear picture of your desired future.

Make a list: Make a list of things you do regularly. See what is your routine and sort out things which you feel are important and must be done regularly to make you feel satisfied and happy.
Categorize: Divide the activities of your routine into subheads like- family, friends, personal, health and wellness.
Choose: Out of the categories you have made above, Choose the areas you want to concentrate upon. This choice must be based on-

What helps you achieve your target?

What gives you happiness and satisfaction from within?

Move ahead: After deciding what is important i.e. what are your priorities; you can now focus on your target. Eliminate the steps of your routine which are a time waste and take you away from your real happiness. Concentrate your priorities and forget the rest. Say “No” to anything that is not in the list of your priority chart. This will help you to manage life better.

In this era of competition doing the right things rightly at the right time is of utmost importance for sustainable and long term growth.

To conclude

Ritu Singal is a well-balanced and very successful lady. She has achieved name and fame in not only the business front but is a very good mother and a very good motivational speaker too. All this was possible because of the focus. Clear vision and life priorities go hand in hand.

Live a life such that you can set an example for everyone. Become an epitome of success and glory. All this is possible only if you have sketched the blueprint of your life which clearly defines the goal and the priorities. Recognizing the priorities of life and living a meaningful life is the key to success and happiness of a person.

Don’t be a mess and do everything worth it, there are short term and long term goals as well. All can be achieved easily is one is balanced and has a vivid thought process. An active and fresh mind with a great idea is the reason for the success of all successful personalities. Whether it is family or friends or work, be the best. Fix your priorities and strive to achieve whatever you want.