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Understanding why we feel unhappy is the first step toward real transformation. When we diagnose the root cause, the solution becomes easier. As a life coach, I see many people struggling for the same reasons. Today, I want to share my personal analysis of why we suffer and how we can break free.

We Become Chain Thinkers

I believe one major reason for our unhappiness is overthinking. Our mind becomes a chain smoker, but with thoughts. It keeps burning negativity one after another. These nonstop negative thoughts drain our energy. They keep us anxious and confused. When the mind thinks endlessly, peace becomes impossible.

We Live in the Past or the Future

Another cause of suffering is our inability to stay present. We either revisit old memories or fear the future. We rarely live in the moment. When we ignore the present, we lose control. Life slips away while our mind wanders in timelines that no longer exist.

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We Trust Superstitions More Than Ourselves

Many people still believe more in superstitions than in action. India is famous for this mindset. A client recently told me that instead of focusing on finding a life partner, her family kept visiting priests. She is a brilliant 35-year-old professor, yet guided into believing that someone had done something to her. For three years, she kept doing rituals instead of taking real steps. When we depend on superstitions, we delay progress and lose confidence.

Social Media Exhausts Our Mind

Social media is another silent killer of happiness. It steals time, drains mental energy, and destroys self-worth. We keep watching others’ lives and start feeling bad about our own. I feel 99.99% of people relate to this. The constant comparisons weaken us emotionally. We forget our strengths while chasing illusions.

We Obsess Over Loss and Gain

We constantly calculate outcomes. What if I fail? What if I lose? What will I gain? This nonstop analysis traps us in fear. Instead of taking action, we remain stuck in “what ifs.” Success needs courage, not endless evaluation.

We Allow Toxic People to Influence Us

Toxic people are everywhere. Sadly, we give them space in our lives. We listen to them, accept their opinions, and let them break our confidence. The wrong company can destroy even the strongest person. When my daughter went to school, I told her only one thing: choose good friends. The right company builds us. The wrong one breaks us.

We Compare, Feel Jealous, and Feed Ego

Comparison is another dangerous habit. Social media increases it. When we compare our life with others, we lose peace. Jealousy grows. Ego grows. We stop learning. Instead of taking action, we spend time thinking about others. This mindset blocks success and happiness.

Checkout: Embracing Personal Growth with Mental Health Coach

Different Choices Create Different Lives

You may have noticed that even in the same family, children grow differently. One becomes successful while the other struggles. One follows a bad habit while the other rejects it. I have seen two siblings with an alcoholic father. One decides to drink because the father did. The other never touches alcohol because he saw the damage. Our choices shape our direction. Our direction shapes our destiny.

There Are Only Two Solutions

After working with thousands of people, I believe there are only two solutions.

1. Get Up and Take Action

Nothing will change unless you act. You will not find solutions by thinking about the past or worrying about the future. You will not find answers from priests, toxic people, or social media. You will not grow by comparing or complaining. Action is the only medicine. Stand up. Move forward. Start now.

2. Strengthen Yourself Spiritually

Spirituality helps us stay grounded. Read good books. Pray. Meditate. Spend time with yourself. When your inner world becomes peaceful, your outer world becomes easier to handle. Spiritual practice builds clarity. It gives strength to fight negativity, depression, and confusion.

Take Charge of Your Life Today

The real cause of suffering is simple: we are lost in thoughts, fears, comparisons, and negativity. We are not taking action. When you break these habits, life changes. Happiness returns. Success becomes possible. Clarity replaces confusion.

So please, get up. Take action. Start now. Your new life is waiting for you.

Let’s succeed together.

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear. This quote resonates deeply with the story of Ritu Singal, a renowned life coach and entrepreneur who has defied all odds to achieve success.

Overcoming Tragedy and Adversity

In 2007, Ritu Singal’s life took a drastic turn when she lost her husband under tragic circumstances. Despite being shattered, she gathered all her courage to save her business from destruction. The path ahead was not easy, with the company facing an outstanding loan of ten million dollars and several real estate issues. However, Ritu’s determination and never-give-up attitude propelled her forward.

Breaking Barriers: Ritu Singal’s Story of Perseverance and Leadership

With an undying spirit, Ritu Singal rose like a phoenix, fighting against all odds and societal expectations. Her resilience and perseverance paid off, as she not only rebuilt her company but also became a leader in her industry. Today, she is the managing director of Raglan Infrastructure Pvt. Ltd., a pioneer in the real estate business.

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Ritu Singal’s commendable work in the community has earned her numerous awards and recognition. Some of her notable achievements include ¹:
– Woman Entrepreneur of the Year 2011: Awarded by ET Now Pan India for her outstanding contribution to the industry
– Pan India Outstanding Personality of the Year: Recognized for her leadership and entrepreneurial skills

As a life coach, Ritu Singal has guided innumerable individuals through dynamic phases of life. Her story serves as a testament to the human spirit’s capacity for resilience and determination. She believes that even transforming one life can have a profound impact, and her mission is to help people awaken to their life’s purpose.

Lessons from Ritu Singal’s Journey

Ritu Singal’s journey offers valuable lessons for anyone facing adversity:
– Courage is key: Standing up for what you believe in, even in the face of fear, is crucial for success.
– Resilience is essential: Bouncing back from setbacks and failures is vital for growth and progress.
– Determination is everything: Never giving up on your goals and dreams can lead to remarkable achievements.

Checkout: A glimpse of my book I Decided Not to Cry

Beyond Fear: Ritu Singh’s Timeless Lesson in Courage and Purpose

The story of Ritu Singh is more than just a tale of corporate turnaround. It is a timeless lesson in what it means to be truly courageous. It reminds us that courage isn’t about the absence of fear; it’s about the presence of a purpose that is greater than that fear.

Are you facing a challenge that seems insurmountable? A personal crisis, a business setback, or a life-altering decision? Remember Ritu Singh’s journey. Remember that your fear is a natural response, but it doesn’t have to be the final answer. You have the power to judge that something else is more important: your dreams, your legacy, your future.

Let her story be the inspiration you need to take that first step. Find your purpose, gather your resolve, and rise like a phoenix. The path may not be easy, but the journey to finding your own courage is the most rewarding one you’ll ever take.

Hi friends, how are you?
Today, I want to discuss a profound question that a very young girl recently asked me. Her question cuts to the core of personal responsibility and destiny: Is what is happening to me God-created, or am I truly responsible for my own reality?

This question immediately brought me back to my own youth. I remember hearing the saying everywhere: “Without God’s will, a leaf does not move.” I used to ponder this deeply. If a leaf cannot move without His will, then who am I? I mean, if He wills it, I will study engineering. If He wills it, I will pursue medicine. If He wills it, I will remain uneducated.

If that is the case, who am I? Do I have any individual will at all? Am I just a puppet—a mere tool in the hands of the Almighty? I was utterly confused about the extent of my own agency.

This mental fog, this confusion about my own power, only increased over time. But thankfully, the answer came when I immersed myself in a powerful philosophy—a spiritual framework that introduced me to the concept of Nine Consciousnesses.

Checkout: Mental Health: The Matters That Matter

The Nine Consciousnesses: How We Perceive Reality

This concept is essential to understanding your mind power and why you are the primary force shaping your life.

In this philosophy, it is taught that our experience of the world is filtered through different layers of consciousness:

The First Five (Sensory Organs): These are the five senses—what we hear, speak, taste, see, and touch. They are the conduits through which raw data enters our system.

The Sixth Consciousness (Information Collector): This is where information is collected and registered, like a camera capturing an image. It registers the facts: what happened.

The Seventh Consciousness (The Perceiver/Ego): This is the layer that takes the raw data and processes it—it dictates how we perceive it, and how we attach meaning to it.

Let me give you an example to illustrate the difference between the sixth (collection) and the seventh (perception):

Imagine three of us are sitting by a window. Suddenly, a person runs past.

Sixth Consciousness (Facts): We all observe the same facts: “The man was about 40 years old, wearing a white shirt, blue jeans, and goggles. He was running away fast.”

Seventh Consciousness (Perception/Action): Our perceptions—and therefore our actions—are completely different:

Person A: Immediately jumps up, thinking, “He must have stolen something! Let’s call the police and create an issue!”

Person B: Shrugs and says, “Leave me alone; I’m talking to you. It’s none of my business.”

Person C: Gets up with concern, thinking, “Maybe he needed help.” That person goes outside and says, “Bhai sir, can I help you?”

Why did all three people perceive the exact same event so differently? Why is one calling the police, one ignoring it, and one trying to help?

The action is the same—a man running. But the reaction is driven by something much deeper.

The Eighth Consciousness: The Storehouse of Our Programming
The reason for this variance lies in the Eighth Consciousness. This is often called the “Storehouse Consciousness.” It is the repository of everything that has programmed you:

Old Sanskaras (Karma): Your habits, tendencies, and residual energy from past lives (if you believe in them).

Current Life Conditioning: The environment in which you grew up—your parents, your education, your culture, your friendships, and the narratives you absorbed.

All these elements make up your sanskars, or deep-seated patterns, through which you process your thoughts. You see everything according to this programming.

Person A, who called the police, might have been raised in an environment of suspicion or fear, where they were constantly told to look out for danger.

Person C, who offered help, might have been raised with boundless compassion, where the impulse is always to care for others.

The Eighth Consciousness controls us, acting like colored glasses through which the world is viewed. Some people are quick to anger and lash out because that is the established sanskar (programming). This leads to the different perceptions in the Seventh Consciousness (some doing good, some doing bad) and, consequently, the different actions or karma (calling the police vs. offering aid).

We often say, “It is God’s will; He made me angry, He made me do this, I had no choice.” We shift the blame onto Him. But in reality, we are simply behaving according to our own ingrained sanskars. This means we have become puppets of our own programming, not of God.

This is the crucial step for taking control of your mental health. If you are perpetually angry, anxious, or depressed, it is because the Eighth Consciousness—the old programming—is dominating your reactions.

The Ninth Consciousness: The Ultimate Free Will and Mind Power

So, are we doomed to be governed by our past programming? Absolutely not!

God has given us a glorious, final level: the Ninth Consciousness. This is your Free Consciousness—pure, untainted, and powerful. It is the inherent wisdom and purity within you, the part of you that is inherently divine and unconditioned.

This Ninth Consciousness holds the key to your self-mastery and the creation of a healthy relationship with yourself and the world.

How do we strengthen the Ninth Consciousness?

Good Karmas (Actions): By consciously choosing to perform good deeds, we create positive causes that purify the entire system.

Good Literature and Learning: By reading good books, engaging with uplifting philosophy, and learning from ethical, mind power masters, we flood our minds with clarity.

Prayer and Spirituality: Through consistent prayer, meditation, and spiritual practice, we connect with the highest, purest aspect of ourselves.

As we strengthen the Ninth Consciousness, we can rise above the control of the Eighth Consciousness—which, in this context, can sometimes feel like a ‘devil’ or a self-sabotaging demon.

You get to issue a command: “I don’t want to be governed by you anymore! I don’t want to see the world through the negative, prejudiced, or angry lens of my past programming.”

You can choose to swap those red, angry glasses for clear ones.

If we do good karmas, if we read good literature, if we pray, we will see everything clearly. We will no longer be trapped by our conditioned reactions.

Another Example of Perception
Think about this second, simpler example:

Someone is breaking something off a tree in a park.

Child (Sees through the lens of mischief): “He is naughty!”

Hungry Person (Sees through the lens of need): “He must be hungry.”

Suspicious Neighbor (Sees through the lens of conflict): “His neighbor must have sent him to ruin the orchard.”

The single action is just a person breaking a branch. But our internal programming dictates our interpretation, which then shapes our emotion and our subsequent action.

Taking Charge of Your Mental Health and Destiny
The beautiful answer to the young girl’s question is this: God created you with the Ninth Consciousness, the ultimate power of choice, which makes you responsible for your actions and your perceptions.

You are not a puppet of God; you are the architect of your destiny, given the ultimate tool—pure, free will—to overcome your past conditioning.

This understanding is the cornerstone of great personal transformation. If you are struggling with your mental health, it is time to stop blaming external factors (or God) and start strengthening your inner core.

Daily Practice: Choose one good karma today.

Daily Input: Read one page of inspiring, uplifting content today.

Daily Focus: Dedicate five minutes to quiet meditation or purposeful prayer to connect with your Ninth Consciousness.

This is the process of purification. This is how you change your inner world so that when you look out the window, your default reaction is one of compassion, clarity, and constructive action, not anger, fear, or withdrawal.

If you want to understand the challenges I had to overcome to achieve this level of clarity—to conquer the devil of my own Eighth Consciousness and become the person I am today—then you must read my autobiography (which documents my struggles with debt, court cases, and the emotional turmoil of rebuilding my life). It is the raw, detailed account of how I strengthened my Ninth Consciousness through relentless good karma and focused spiritual effort.

Don’t let your past programming define your future. You have the supreme power within you. Utilize your Ninth Consciousness and see your world transform.

Life doesn’t always unfold as we plan. In 2007, I faced one of the most challenging phases of my life — I lost my husband. Along with the emotional storm came countless struggles — pending loans, court cases, and a failing business. Everything seemed to collapse around me.

But as a life coach, I often say, the darkest times shape the strongest souls. Back then, I wasn’t the “Best Life Coach” people now know me as. I was a woman trying to rebuild her life, one decision at a time.

The Challenge of Leadership

When I took charge of the business, I quickly realized something disturbing — people were not serious about their work. Machines weren’t handled properly, raw materials were wasted, and efficiency was missing.

I had two options — scold them or fire them. But neither felt right. Deep down, I knew that the real problem wasn’t their capability — it was their mindset. They didn’t feel connected to the company. They lacked a sense of purpose.

That’s when I decided to change my approach — from authority to empathy.

The Airplane Story That Changed Everything

One day, I gathered all the workers at the factory. I didn’t have a speech ready, but a thought struck me — something I once read in a book.

I asked, “Have you ever been on an airplane?”
Some said yes, some said no.

Then I asked, “What does an airplane need to fly?”They said — “a pilot,” “fuel,” “power,” “energy.”

I smiled and said, “Exactly. And what happens if the airplane doesn’t get these?”
They answered, “It crashes.”

I looked around and told them, “Our company is that airplane. Each one of you is its power, energy, and pilot. If we all give our best, we will fly high. If we don’t, we will crash. The choice is ours.”

Those few minutes transformed everything. The energy shifted. People began working with ownership, with pride. For the first time, they realized that they weren’t just employees — they were the heartbeat of the organization.

Touching Emotions Builds Teams

I learned that emotions drive people more than instructions ever can. So, I began focusing on team building through emotional connection.

We started organizing events that included everyone — even blue-collar workers. I joined them personally, laughed with them, and listened to their challenges. These moments of connection brought magic to our workplace.

However, I still noticed a pattern. Whenever I introduced a new idea, I heard replies like,
“This isn’t possible.”
“We’ve tried it before.”
“It never works.”

That mindset was holding them back more than any external obstacle.

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The Elephant Story: Breaking the Chains of Limiting Beliefs

So, one day, I shared the famous elephant story.

I asked them, “Have you seen elephants in a circus?”
They nodded.

I continued, “Do you know how they are kept tied with just a small rope?”

They looked puzzled. So I explained:

When an elephant is a baby, it’s tied with a strong chain. The baby tries to break free, fails, and gets hurt. Eventually, it gives up. Later, even when it grows into a strong adult, it doesn’t try again. It believes it cannot break free — though it easily could.

That story struck a chord. Many of them realized that they, too, were like that elephant — bound by invisible ropes of self-doubt and fear.

I told them, “If we start believing that we can do it, we truly can. The only thing stopping us is our mindset.”

From that day onward, everything changed.

Empowering Through Mindset and Belief

The transformation I witnessed was beyond imagination. Employees who once avoided responsibility became proactive. People who once complained began contributing ideas.

That’s the power of personality development counselling — it helps people discover their true potential. It helps them see beyond limitations and embrace a growth mindset.

Each person started viewing themselves as a vital part of something bigger. We weren’t just running a factory anymore; we were building dreams together.

Becoming the Best Life Coach

Looking back, those experiences shaped my journey as a life coach. I realized that success isn’t about managing people — it’s about inspiring them. It’s about helping them find meaning in what they do.

Today, through my sessions on team building and personality development, I continue to share these real-life lessons. Because I’ve lived through those struggles, and I know the difference mindset can make.

Just like that airplane — with belief, purpose, and unity — anyone can soar to great heights.

Final Thoughts: Fly High, Believe in Yourself

We all have two choices — stay grounded by our fears or rise above with faith. The moment you decide to believe in yourself, your wings unfold.

So, never let the rope of doubt tie you down. You are powerful, capable, and destined to fly.

Remember, your life, your team, and your dreams are your airplane — and you are the pilot.

Hey, don’t give up. I know, it’s easier said than done. You might be thinking, “Everyone says don’t give up—but why not? How not to?” You’ve worked for years—on projects, relationships, health, children—and yet, it feels like nothing is changing. You’re tired. You want to quit.

But let me remind you—giving up is where most people lose everything. When we give up, we open doors to despair, depression, and hopelessness. There is a limit to how much we can take, but that doesn’t mean we stop trying.

We Are All Work in Progress

Have you ever heard of the term WIP—Work in Progress? In industries, many materials go through stages before turning into a beautiful final product. Think about leather—it’s processed, coated, and polished before becoming something valuable like a handbag or car seat.

The same applies to us. We are all being shaped, refined, and tested by life’s experiences. If we leave the process halfway, we’ll never reach our full potential.

Would you bake a cake and pull it out halfway? Of course not. It wouldn’t be edible. Or imagine being on a flight and saying midway, “I want to get off.” That’s impossible. You’d crash. Life works the same way—once you’ve started, you can’t stop halfway.

Keep Going Until the End

Each of us is a living factory of growth. Our character, patience, and strength are being manufactured every single day. When we give up, we stop that process. But when we persist, we evolve into something beautiful.

The people who achieve greatness are not extraordinary. They simply didn’t give up. They kept learning, improving, and polishing themselves until they became the “final product” the world admired.

Checkout: A glimpse of my book I Decided Not to Cry

Steve Jobs: The Power of Staying on Course

Have you ever thought Steve Jobs had an easy life? He didn’t. Born to an unwed mother, given up for adoption, and raised by non-college-educated parents—his journey was full of challenges.

He joined Reed College, but dropped out when he realized his parents couldn’t afford the fees. He started living with friends, selling Coke bottles for coins, and attending random classes like calligraphy. That class, which seemed useless at the time, became the foundation for Apple’s elegant design later.

Even after creating Apple, Jobs was fired from his own company. Most people would have quit. He didn’t. Instead, he started new ventures—NeXT and Pixar—which Apple later bought. He returned as CEO and revolutionized technology forever.

That’s the essence of not giving up—turning pain into purpose and rejection into reinvention.

The Spider and the King

Let’s go back to the 13th century. Robert the Bruce, the King of Scotland, lost six battles trying to free his country from England. Frustrated and hopeless, he hid in a cave, ready to end his life.

There, he saw a spider building a web. The spider failed six times, yet tried again the seventh. Watching that small creature, Robert found courage. He rebuilt his army, fought again, and won Scotland’s freedom.

One spider—and one more attempt—changed history.

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A client of mine once failed 18 interviews. She cried, doubted herself, and wanted to quit. But I reminded her—you are work in progress. She prepared harder, improved her communication, and gave one more interview.

She got the job—with a salary of ₹2.5 lakh per month. That’s what persistence does—it transforms failure into fortune.

My Own Journey: From Housewife to Entrepreneur

People often ask how I survived a ₹60 crore debt, hundreds of court cases, and the pain of rebuilding life. The answer is simple—I refused to give up.

Each morning, I told myself, “Today again, I shall not be defeated.” I faced legal notices, business struggles, and sleepless nights. But I kept going.

Four years later, I was awarded “Woman Entrepreneur of the Year” in 2011. It wasn’t luck. It was perseverance, faith, and daily commitment to rise again.

Checkout: The Art of Self-Care Prioritizing Your Physical, Emotional, and Mental Well-being in 2025

You Are Still in the Making

Maybe you’re tired today. Maybe your efforts seem invisible. But remember—you are not done yet. You are still being molded by life, and your final product will be magnificent.

Every challenge adds a new layer to your strength. Every failure teaches you something. Every delay is preparing you for something better.

So, get up. Wipe your tears. Take a deep breath. Tell yourself—“Today again, I shall not be defeated.”

You are not losing—you are learning. You are not breaking—you are being built.

Final Words: Don’t Quit Before the Miracle

Success doesn’t come to the one who starts strong—it comes to the one who never stops. Your journey may be tough, but so are you.

Remember, the cake only rises in the oven. The diamond only shines after pressure. The champion only emerges after defeat.

So don’t give up. Keep going. Your story is still being written—and it will be beautiful.