Marriage is a colossal part of life. It brings a lot of changes in one’s life. As soon as a wedding is arranged, people start planning for the wedding. However, somewhere amidst that planning people forget about the emotions of the bride or groom.
Marriages are built on efforts and trust. It requires time to prepare a person before marrying them. Being a life coach, I have counseled many couples and individuals before their wedding.
I believe premarital counselling is a blessing. It prepares you for a new phase of life. If you’re getting married or someone close to you is getting married, you should always consider getting premarital counselling.
Once a girl who was about to get married in a month contacted me. She was a pretty, independent, and loving girl. She was getting married to her boyfriend, whom she had been dating for the past four years.
Even after knowing him for so long, the girl started getting anxious as the day of the wedding was approaching. Most of the time, the family remains so busy managing the wedding, they forget to pay attention to the person getting married.
As she visited me, she told me how she gets anxiety attacks sometimes thinking about how her life is going to change. Thoughts like will she be a good wife, will she adjust well with the boy’s family, or is it a right decision kept her awake for so many consecutive nights.
She felt she was being kiddish and so did not discuss it with her family. Now, not only her, but I feel anyone who’s about to get married go through this phase.
As her counseling began, she discussed her thoughts, fears, and doubts with me. As we started getting along, she gained back her lost confidence.
Within four sessions, she was not only prepared but excited to get married. It is how blissful premarital counseling can be for couples.
She visited me six months after marriage to tell how my tips for happy marriage helped her in settling well with her family. She felt she could not have adjusted in her in-laws, if she would not have taken the counselling.
What is premarital counselling?
Many people have a mindset that counselling is something that married couples undertake when they face challenges in their married life. It isn’t the case always. You don’t have to wait for things to get ugly before you start working on them.
Premarital counseling helps you and your partner understand each other better, learn to identify issues and prepare for a life together. It is best for couples who are engaged. You’ll learn to handle conflicts and stay strong together.
What can you discuss in premarital counselling?
Another factor that couples consider before getting counselling is what they will ask the coach. Counselling is all about being yourself. You can ask anything you want, clear any doubts that you have.
Premarital counseling defines marriage expectations. Here are some things that you can discuss with your counselor.
- You can learn ways to resolve conflicts
One thing that I have seen in most young couples is that they do not freely discuss any subject. Most couples prevent talking to avoid unwanted arguments, or they expect the other person to understand on their own. However, they fail to understand that communication is the key to any healthy relationship. When you sit with your therapist, communication flows freely solving your issues.
- You can discuss your marriage expectations
Marriage can mean one thing to you and another thing to your partner. Your idea of marriage might not match their idea. These differences seem small before marriage but turn colossal post marriage. In marriage counseling, you’ll be able to uncover what you both believe and understand about marriage. You’ll understand your role and other people’s expectations. It makes things easier after marriage.
- You can discuss each other’s past
Many times the past of one partner creates problems in marriage. I have seen couples do not open much about their past before marriage openly. I believe it is crucial to discuss one’s background for knowing each other better. Premarital counseling gives a perfect platform where you can discuss it healthily.
- You can discuss sex issues
Sex remains a taboo for many people. There is no doubt in the fact that sex remains one of the most crucial subjects to be discussed before marriage. Intimacy is highly personal, and many couples face intimacy issues at some point in marriage. Your counselor will help you understand the specific issues and resolve them. You might not feel comfortable, but it will be for your benefit.
- You can discuss parenthood concerns
A very common topic that couples discuss before marriage is if they want to have children or not. There is no doubt in it that once you are married, people expect you to have a baby. While one partner might be interested in becoming a parent, the other might not. You can always discuss your interests with a counselor to get the right guidance. Premarital counseling will help you define issues and prepare you for future instances.
How to make the most of your premarital counselling sessions?
If you have decided to undergo premarital counseling for a happy married life, you should also know how to make the most of each session. Here are a few tips to make the most of your counseling sessions.
- Firstly, you need to accept that your marriage can become challenging at times. No marriage is perfect, and you’ll see hard times. However, you can learn ways to handle such situations better through counseling.
- Secondly, you should know that counseling is not about winning. It is about fixing and changing things that are not working for your relationship.
- Premarital counseling sessions remain private, and you don’t have to worry about what people would say. It is also better if you keep your counseling private.
- Do not hesitate from asking or discussing anything that has been bothering your bond. It is up to you to make the best of your counseling sessions.
What to expect from our service?
- I guide my clients by initiating a healthy conversation. I create an atmosphere where couples can talk about anything from money, sex, and kids. Such guided conversations prevent couples from going off a topic or lose focus.
- Conflicts in relationships remain a crucial issue in couples. Couples generally do not know how to react during arguments or conflicts. You could either be remaining silent or yelling at each other. I always help couples to be honest with each other. I teach them how to listen and communicate more effectively to reach a glee solution.
- Resentments in relationships are common these days. I can help you resolve these issues to free your relationship before massive damage is done.
- Many couples are too afraid to get married. I help couples understand relationships and the concept of marriages to remove their fears.
- I help couples create realistic expectations in relationships. They should know what they should expect from their partner and when they should expect it. It removes many chances of conflicts after marriages.
- My premarital counseling will help you identify the roots of your future marriage. You’ll get an idea about the changes, stress, and issues you might face.
Why choose my premarital counselling?
Premarital counselling is a service of commitment and responsibility. I have been counselling couples for the last many years. My counselling has helped many couples lead a happy married life.
I use effective methods to help clients open up about their problems. For some people, it can be challenging to get premarital counselling. However, it is for your best. It will help you put efforts that are required to make your marriage work. Premarital counselling will prepare you for your new role and responsibilities. If you are about to get married or facing any troubles in your relationship, talk to us today!