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Hello, amazing souls! This is Ritu Singal, your life coach, and today we’re diving deep into two powerful concepts that can transform your life: becoming truly reachable and mastering your time for financial freedom.

You might be thinking, “Ritu, how can I manage money when I barely have any? How can I manage time when I’m constantly overwhelmed?” I hear you, and that’s precisely why this conversation is so crucial.

The Myth of “When I Have Enough”

Many of us fall into the trap of waiting. We tell ourselves:

• “I’ll go to the gym and get healthy when I have more time.”
• “I’ll start saving when I earn a lot more.”
• “I’ll manage my time when my schedule is less hectic.”

But here’s the powerful truth: it doesn’t work that way. You will only have time when you manage it. You will only have money when you manage it. Your health will be at its best when you prioritize and manage it. This isn’t about having an abundance to begin with; it’s about cultivating the habits that create abundance.

The Power of Compounding: A Penny Today, Millions Tomorrow?

Let me pose a question that highlights the profound impact of consistent, small actions. Imagine I offer you a choice:

1. One million dollars right here, right now.
2. One penny that doubles every day for 31 days.

What would you choose? Most people, in their immediate gratification, would jump at the million dollars. “Forget the penny!” they’d exclaim. “Who has the patience to track that every day?”

But have you ever truly considered the power of that humble penny? Let’s do the math:

• Day 1: $0.01
• Day 2: $0.02
• Day 3: $0.04
• Day 4: $0.08
• Day 5: $0.16
• Day 10: $5.12
• Day 20: $5,242.88
• Day 25: $167,772.16¹
• Day 30: $5,368,709.12
• Day 31: $10,737,418.24

Yes, you read that right. That single penny, with the magic of compounding interest, would be worth over ten million dollars in just 31 days! This incredible principle isn’t just for money; it applies to your time, your health, and your personal growth. Small, consistent efforts compound into monumental results.

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A Personal Story of Compounding Growth

I remember when my daughter was born. Birthdays were a big deal for our friends, who often spent 5,000 to 10,000 rupees on celebrations – a significant sum back then. My husband was in a job, and while we enjoyed the moment, our financial resources were limited. However, we made a conscious decision. Instead of splurging on lavish parties, we deposited a small amount in our daughter’s name and invested it wisely.

Twenty-five years later, my daughter is an Engineer, and she needed a substantial amount to pursue her studies in America. Guess what? The initial, seemingly small investment had grown exponentially, providing exactly what she needed. This is the power of wise investment and patience.

But what if you lack patience? What if you feel like you need immediate results? That’s where we need to shift our mindset and understand that sustained effort, even in small increments, leads to remarkable outcomes.

Practical Strategies for Time and Money Management

Now, let’s explore some actionable tips that you can start implementing today to manage your time better, achieve financial freedom, and even teach these invaluable skills to your children.

1. The 50/30/20 Rule (and its variations)

This is a fundamental principle for financial management. It suggests that you allocate your after-tax income as follows:

• 50% for Needs: This covers your essential expenses like housing (rent/mortgage), utilities, groceries, transportation, and basic clothing.² These are the non-negotiables to sustain your life.
• 30% for Wants: This portion is for things that enhance your life but aren’t strictly necessary.³ Think dining out, entertainment, hobbies, new gadgets, special shopping, and vacations. This is where you enjoy the fruits of your labor while still being mindful.
• 20% for Savings & Debt Repayment: This is your foundation for financial growth and security. This includes contributions to your emergency fund, retirement accounts, investments, and paying down high-interest debt. This is where your money starts working for you.

I understand that for some, especially those with lower incomes or significant responsibilities, surviving on 50% for needs can be challenging. For example, if your salary is only 10,000 rupees in a high-cost area, 50% might not be enough. In such cases, consider adapting the rule.

A more flexible approach could be the 60/30/10 rule:

• 60% for Needs: A slightly larger portion allocated to essentials.
• 30% for Wants: Remains the same for discretionary spending.
• 10% for Savings & Debt Repayment: Even if it’s a smaller percentage, the act of consistent saving is crucial.

I recall when my husband and I got married, his salary was a modest 2,250 rupees. From that, we paid rent, managed all our expenses, and crucially, we saved money. Gradually, those small savings compounded, allowing us to fulfill bigger needs later on. The amount might seem tiny, but the habit was monumental.

Think of Amitabh Bachchan’s inspiring story about his father. He would spot interesting rocks in the market but wouldn’t buy them immediately. Instead, he would carry them home slowly, one step at a time, over several months. Eventually, he brought a massive rock all the way home. The lesson? Consistent, small steps lead to significant progress. Just like bringing a rock home step-by-step, consistently saving a small amount each month will accumulate into substantial wealth over time.

Checkout: The Best Motivational Books to Inspire You

2. Cultivate Discipline in Spending

My second tip is all about discipline yourself when it comes to spending. I remember a trip with my daughter and a friend. My daughter wanted a small toy swing that cost only ten rupees. My friend thought it was silly and suggested buying it, but I declined. It wasn’t about the ten rupees; it was about instilling the value of money and understanding that not every desire needs to be instantly gratified.

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3. Instill Healthy Habits Early On

My third tip focuses on the kinds of habits we encourage in our children. Often, we inadvertently foster luxurious or unhealthy habits. For instance, constantly allowing chocolates or excessive screen time. While these might seem harmless, they can lead to poor long-term habits.

Instead, let’s focus on healthy habits. How do you motivate them to be active? Maybe it’s by promising a special racket for their favorite sport, a new football, or even specialized coaching for their passion. This isn’t about bribery; it’s about connecting healthy choices with positive reinforcement and demonstrating that investing in their well-being is valuable.

The Journey to Financial Freedom and Time Mastery

The journey to becoming financially free and a master of your time isn’t about grand gestures or winning the lottery. It’s about consistent, deliberate actions. It’s about understanding the power of compounding, both in your finances and in your habits. It’s about making conscious choices about how you earn, save, spend, and invest.

By embracing these principles – the 50/30/20 rule, disciplined spending, and fostering healthy habits – you lay a strong foundation for a life of abundance and control. Remember, every small step you take today is a giant leap towards your future self.

What’s one small step you can take today to better manage your time or money? Share your thoughts below!

Parental guilt. It’s one of the most invisible yet emotionally exhausting parts of raising children. We don’t talk about it openly, but we all feel it—especially when we find ourselves saying “no” to something our children deeply want. Whether it’s that second toy, a phone upgrade, or another ride on the fair swing—saying “no” often leaves us wondering: Did I just hurt them? Am I being too harsh? Am I failing as a parent?

The truth is—“no” can be one of the most loving words a parent ever says. And I say this not just as a mother, but as a life coach who has walked this road both personally and professionally.

Let me begin with a small story—one of many real-life moments that shaped my parenting philosophy.

The Fairground Test: A Seed of Wisdom Planted Early

Years ago, when my daughters were very young, I took them to a local fair along with a friend and her daughter. It was a simple outing—balloons, swings, candy stalls, laughter in the air. The girls went on a swing ride and, naturally, after one round, they wanted to go again. “Please Mama, just one more!” they said, wide-eyed and pleading.

I smiled and gently said, “Today, we’ll do just one ride. Now let’s go pick something to eat—you can choose whatever ice cream you like.”

My friend looked surprised. “It’s just ₹10,” she said. “Let them go again.” I replied softly, “It’s not about the money. It’s about training their mind. In life, you don’t always get what you want—and learning that early is a gift.”

That moment stayed with me—not because I refused them a second ride, but because I saw a lesson take root. It wasn’t about the immediate gratification of another swing; it was about laying the groundwork for a much bigger life lesson: delayed gratification and the reality that desires aren’t always instantly fulfilled. This simple “no” was an act of profound love, teaching them to navigate disappointment with grace, a crucial skill for future happiness.

The Honda City Demand: Unchecked Indulgence vs. Healthy Boundaries

Years later, I visited another friend. Her daughter, just admitted to college, was demanding a Honda City as her first car. It wasn’t a conversation—it was a confrontation. Tears, shouting, emotional blackmail, and financial stress were all at play.

This wasn’t about a car. It was about how unchecked indulgence turns into unrealistic entitlement. Somewhere along the way, the child had learned that love equals giving in—and any denial meant rejection. This scenario painfully illustrates how a lack of firm boundaries in childhood can lead to significant emotional and relational challenges in young adulthood. The inability to hear “no” becomes a barrier to adapting to the real world, where consequences and limitations are inevitable.

Guilt Gifts and Emotional Gaps: The Cost of Over-Giving

Another close friend, a single working mother, tried to make up for her absence by granting every wish her child expressed—gadgets, branded shoes, lavish gifts. She told herself, “I’m not there enough, at least let me give her what she asks for.”

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Years later, her daughter faced serious anxiety and identity issues. Over-giving hadn’t bridged the emotional gap—it had widened it. When material possessions become a substitute for genuine presence and emotional connection, children can feel a deep void. They may struggle with their sense of self-worth, believing their value is tied to what they own rather than who they are.

I, too, have raised my daughters as a single mother. But I made a clear choice early on: I would be present, not just provide. I refused to let guilt become the driving force behind my parenting. And the results? Children who are emotionally secure, grateful, grounded—and happy. This wasn’t easy; it required constant self-awareness and a willingness to stand firm in my convictions, even when it felt uncomfortable. But the peace of mind knowing I was fostering resilience and true contentment in my children was invaluable.

Checkout: Development of Self-Control in Young Children: A Life Coach’s Perspective

Why Parents Struggle to Say “No”: Unpacking the Pressures

Today’s parents are under intense pressure. The external forces and internal struggles often make it incredibly difficult to utter that simple, yet powerful, two-letter word: “no.”

• Social media comparison: We scroll through curated feeds, seeing other children with the latest gadgets, designer clothes, or on exotic vacations. This can lead to an insidious thought: Why does her child have more? Am I depriving mine? The constant barrage of seemingly perfect lives creates an unrealistic benchmark, fueling parental insecurity.
• Cultural expectations: Especially in joint families or certain cultural contexts, there can be immense pressure from in-laws or other relatives to indulge children, sometimes viewing any denial as harshness. This can lead to internal conflict for parents who are trying to instill different values.
• Fear of being judged: Am I a bad parent if I don’t provide “the best” for my child? This fear often stems from a desire to be seen as a “good” parent, leading us to overcompensate with material things or endless concessions.
• Working parent guilt: Especially among single parents or mothers returning to careers, there’s a pervasive feeling of not being “enough.” This guilt often manifests as a desire to compensate for perceived absence by fulfilling every whim, leading to an unhealthy cycle of over-indulgence.

But here’s the truth: Children don’t need everything. They need enough—love, guidance, structure, and trust. They need parents who are secure enough in their own values to set boundaries, even when it’s met with resistance.

The Psychology Behind “No”: Building Character and Resilience

Saying “no” is not about denying joy—it’s about preparing children for life. Every refusal, when done with empathy and explanation, becomes:

• A reality check in a safe environment: Childhood is the ideal time for children to learn that the world won’t always cater to their desires. Learning this within the loving confines of their home, rather than through harsh external experiences, allows them to process disappointment in a supportive setting.
• A chance to develop emotional resilience: The ability to bounce back from disappointment is a cornerstone of mental well-being. When children learn to cope with not getting what they want, they build emotional muscles that will serve them throughout their lives.
• A training ground for delayed gratification: In an instant-gratification world, teaching patience is more critical than ever. Saying “no” now, with the promise of something later (or nothing at all), helps children understand the value of working towards goals and appreciating what they have.

In a world that won’t always say “yes” to their ideas, demands, or relationships, our job as parents is not to cushion every fall but to prepare them to land strong. We are building their internal compass, equipping them with the tools to navigate life’s inevitable ups and downs.

 Mindset Shifts for Parents: Embracing the Power of Deliberate Parenting

Shifting our internal narrative around saying “no” is crucial. These are some beliefs I personally follow—and often share with my clients—that have profoundly impacted my approach to parenting:

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• Saying “no” is not rejection; it’s redirection. You’re not rejecting your child, but rather redirecting their focus, energy, or expectations towards something more beneficial or realistic.
• Love is not measured by how much we give, but how wisely we guide. True love isn’t about material abundance; it’s about providing the wisdom and structure necessary for a child to thrive emotionally and intellectually.
• We’re raising adults, not pampered children. Every decision we make as parents should be viewed through the lens of what kind of independent, resilient, and responsible adult we want our child to become.
• A moment of disappointment today prevents years of entitlement tomorrow. While it’s hard to see our children upset in the short term, remember that these small disappointments are building blocks for a healthier, more grounded future.

 Practical Tools to Say “No” Without the Guilt: Empathetic Boundaries

Saying “no” doesn’t have to be a battle. With the right approach, it can be an opportunity for connection and growth.

1. Connect Before You Correct: Children must feel heard. Acknowledge their feelings first.
   • “I see how excited you are for another ride. It’s fun, I know!” (Connection)
   • Then add the limit: “But today we’re doing just one. Let’s look forward to our ice cream now.” (Correction with redirection)
2. Offer Alternatives: Not “no” without hope, but “no” with options. This teaches flexibility and creativity.
   • “We’re not buying that toy today, but let’s add it to your ‘wish list’ and work towards it.”
3. Explain Your Values: Let them understand why you are setting a boundary. This helps them internalize your family’s principles.
   • “In our home, we don’t buy everything just because we can. We make thoughtful choices about what we truly need and value.”
4. Let Them Contribute: Encourage earning or saving. This instills financial literacy and the value of hard work.
   • “If you still want that by next month, let’s think about how you can save some of your pocket money or do a few extra chores to contribute towards it.”

 Exercises to Tame Parental Guilt: Self-Compassion in Action

Parental guilt can be a heavy burden. Here are some simple yet powerful exercises to help you reframe those feelings and cultivate self-compassion:

•  The Guilt Reframing Journal: When guilt strikes, take a moment to write down your thoughts.
  • Trigger: What specifically caused the guilt? (e.g., “I said no to a new video game.”)
  • Reality: What were your limitations or reasons for saying no? (e.g., “It’s outside our budget right now, and they already have several games.”)
  • Growth: What is your child learning from this? (e.g., “They’re learning about budgeting, patience, and that not everything is instantly available. They’re developing resilience.”)
•  The Five-Breath Pause: Before giving in to a demand out of guilt, pause.
  • Breathe in for 5 counts, exhale for 5. Repeat a few times.
  • This simple act gives you a moment for logic to replace the immediate emotional pull of guilt, allowing you to respond thoughtfully rather than react impulsively.
• The Self-Coaching Statement: Create a mantra that empowers you.
  • “I am not denying my child love. I am giving them strength.”
  • Repeat this to yourself whenever you feel that familiar tug of guilt. It’s a powerful reminder of your higher purpose as a parent.

Helping Children Cope With “No”: Nurturing Emotional Intelligence

Children, like adults, don’t enjoy rejection. But with the right tools, they learn to handle it, transforming moments of disappointment into opportunities for emotional growth:

1. Name Emotions: Help them articulate what they’re feeling.
   • “You’re feeling upset—totally okay. It’s natural to feel that way when you can’t get what you want. I sometimes feel that way too.”
2. Create a ‘Someday List’: Let them record their wishes. This teaches patience, goal-setting, and gives them a sense of agency.
   • Have a special notebook where they can write or draw things they wish for. Revisit it occasionally.
3. Praise Emotional Maturity: Acknowledge and reinforce their positive responses to disappointment.
   • “You stayed calm even when I said no. That shows real strength and maturity.”
4. Turn It Into a Teachable Moment: Share your own childhood disappointments and how they made you wiser or stronger. This normalizes the experience and builds connection.
   • “When I was your age, I really wanted a particular toy, and my parents couldn’t get it for me. It felt disappointing at the time, but I learned to find joy in other things, and it taught me patience.”

Checkout: The Art of Self-Care Prioritizing Your Physical, Emotional, and Mental Well-being in 2025

 Prioritising Your Wellbeing Without Guilt: The Non-Negotiable Self-Care

Especially in Indian culture, parenting often becomes an identity of constant sacrifice, particularly for mothers. There’s an unspoken expectation that a good parent always puts their child’s needs first, often to the detriment of their own well-being. But burnt-out parents cannot raise emotionally nourished children. An empty cup cannot pour.

Make space for your needs; it’s not selfish, it’s essential:

• 15 minutes of silence in the morning: Before the chaos begins, find a moment of peace.
• A cup of tea without multitasking: Savor a moment just for yourself, without checking emails or doing chores.
• A weekly outing for yourself: Even if it’s just a walk in the park or a coffee with a friend.

And critically, explain it to your children. Say:

“When I take care of myself, I’m happier and have more energy. And that means I can love you even better and be the best parent I can be.” This also models healthy self-care for them, teaching them the importance of balancing their own needs with their responsibilities.

 Final Reflection: What Are We Really Saying? The Enduring Power of “No”

When we say “no” with love, we are not shutting down a dream—we are opening the door to deeper lessons:

• That real joy doesn’t always cost money; it can be found in presence, experiences, and connection.
• That not getting what we want is a natural, inevitable part of life, and we have the capacity to cope with it.
• That parents are guides, not vending machines, here to illuminate the path, not just fulfill desires.
• That love is not measured in quantity of things, but in quality of presence, guidance, and unwavering support.

My daughters today thank me for those moments when I stood firm. They understand now that what I gave them wasn’t just boundaries, but emotional muscles to face life with grace, resilience, and a deep sense of self-worth. They are capable, independent individuals who understand the value of effort and the beauty of gratitude.

And every time I speak to another parent torn between guilt and guidance, I remind them gently:

“The most powerful thing you can give your child is not the world—but the wisdom to walk through it.”

What “no” are you ready to say with love today, knowing it’s a profound act of parenting wisdom?

As I reflect on my journey, I realize that reading Ritu Singal’s story in “Decided Not to Cry” was a turning point for me. At the time, I was facing significant challenges in my business, including legal complications that had me running from one courtroom to another. I was exhausted, bitter, and ready to give up. But Ritu’s story resonated with me on a deep level.

The Power of Resilience

Ritu’s journey through the legal maze, particularly her battle with a powerful industrialist over a stalled apartment project, felt eerily familiar. What struck me most wasn’t the legal struggle itself, but the loneliness of it. The sense of fighting against a system that wasn’t designed to hear urgency. Yet, Ritu’s resilience and determination in the face of adversity were truly inspiring.

A Lesson in Courage

One scene that stayed with me was Ritu’s meeting with Ms. Kavita Kohli, the prosecution lawyer. Ritu’s plea for understanding, not just for herself but for the people waiting for their homes and suppliers who had trusted her, was a powerful moment. It made me realize that not every battle we fight is about winning; some are about showing up, staying standing, and not letting the system swallow our purpose.

Applying the Lessons

After reading Ritu’s story, I stopped waiting for the “perfect lawyer” or the “right time” to act. I stopped blaming the system and started learning how to work through it. I took away valuable lessons from Ritu’s experience, including the importance of steady conviction, the power of resilience, and the courage to keep going even when it’s hard.

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The Impact of Ritu’s Story

Ritu’s story had a profound impact on me. It reminded me of my own strength and resilience, and it gave me the courage to face my challenges head-on. I’m grateful for her story, and I believe it can inspire others who are facing similar struggles.

Key Takeaways

– The system may be slow, but your conviction must be steady.
– Battles are lonely, but you’re not the only one walking that path.
– Sometimes, the most courageous thing is to just not give up when every cell in your body wants to.

Ritu Singal’s story is a testament to the power of resilience and determination. Her journey teaches us that even in the face of adversity, we have the strength to keep going. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or struggling to find the courage to keep going, I encourage you to read “Decided Not to Cry” and discover the lessons that Ritu’s Path.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

Q: What inspired the author to write about Ritu Singal’s story?
A: The author was deeply inspired by Ritu Singal’s resilience and determination in the face of adversity, which resonated with their own experiences of facing significant challenges in their business.

Q: What specific challenges did Ritu Singal face in her journey?
A: Ritu Singal faced a complex legal battle with a powerful industrialist over a stalled apartment project, which tested her resolve, strength, and determination.

Q: How did the author benefit from reading Ritu Singal’s story?
A: The author benefited greatly from reading Ritu Singal’s story, as it reminded them of their own strength and resilience, and gave them the courage to face their challenges head-on.

Q: What lessons can readers take away from Ritu Singal’s story?
A: Readers can take away valuable lessons from Ritu Singal’s story, including the importance of steady conviction, the power of resilience, and the courage to keep going even when it’s hard.

Q: How can readers apply the lessons from Ritu Singal’s story to their own lives?
A: Readers can apply the lessons from Ritu Singal’s story by staying committed to their goals and values, working through challenges rather than waiting for the “perfect” solution, and finding the courage to keep going even when faced with adversity.

Q: What impact did Ritu Singal’s story have on the author?
A: Ritu Singal’s story had a profound impact on the author, as it inspired them to face their challenges with renewed courage and determination, and reminded them of the importance of resilience and steady conviction.

Q: Why is Ritu Singal’s story important for others who are facing similar struggles?
A: Ritu Singal’s story is important for others who are facing similar struggles because it shows that they are not alone, and that with determination, resilience, and courage, they can overcome even the most daunting challenges.

Q: What message does Ritu Singal’s story convey about the power of resilience and determination?
A: Ritu Singal’s story conveys a powerful message about the importance of resilience and determination in overcoming adversity, and shows that with these qualities, we can achieve great things even in the face of significant challenges.

Q: How can readers access Ritu Singal’s story?
A: Readers can access Ritu Singal’s story by reading her book “Decided Not to Cry”, which shares her journey and the lessons she learned along the way.

Checkout: The Transformative Journey of Ritu Singal: From Housewife to Empowering Keynote Speaker in India

Conclusion: Finding Strength in Adversity

In conclusion, Ritu Singal’s story is a testament to the power of resilience and determination. Her journey teaches us that even in the face of adversity, we have the strength to keep going, and that with steady conviction, courage, and resilience, we can overcome even the most daunting challenges.

Whether you’re facing personal or professional struggles, Ritu Singal’s story offers valuable lessons and inspiration to help you stay committed to your goals and values, and to find the courage to keep going even when it’s hard.

By reading her story and applying the lessons she learned, you can develop the resilience and determination needed to overcome any obstacle and achieve your goals.

As I sat with Shivangi, discussing her thoughts on a recent event, I realized the importance of perspective in shaping our experiences. She shared with me her envy of Saurav’s new car, gifted by his elder brother, and how it made her feel like she was missing out.

A Shift in Perspective

Shivangi’s question, “Why not think like this – wish you had enough money to gift your brother a car?” made me pause. It highlighted the difference between focusing on what we get from others and what we can do for others. This simple shift in perspective can have a profound impact on our well-being and relationships.

The SIN and SUN Analogy

A clever wordplay sums it up nicely: “When I comes between S and N, it becomes SIN. When U comes between S and N, it becomes SUN.” This analogy illustrates the difference between focusing on ourselves and focusing on others.

When we prioritize our own needs and desires, we can create negative emotions and experiences. However, when we focus on what we can do for others, we can become like the sun, shining brightly and positively impacting those around us.

Checkout: A glimpse of my book I Decided Not to Cry

The Power of Small Actions

I realized that I often get caught up in thinking about massive social issues and feel overwhelmed, wondering how I can make a difference. However, this mindset can also stop us from taking small actions in our daily lives that can positively impact others. By shifting our perspective and focusing on what we can do for others, we can create a ripple effect of kindness and positivity.

A Journey to Positivity

Through this conversation with Shivangi, I learned the importance of perspective and its impact on our experiences. By choosing to focus on what we can do for others, we can create a more positive and fulfilling life. As I reflect on my own journey, I realize that small actions and a shift in perspective can lead to significant positive changes.

About the Author

Ritu Singal is a life coach with extensive experience in conflict resolution and emotional resilience. Through her work, she empowers individuals to build emotional resilience and navigate life’s challenges with confidence and determination.

Are you truly willing to endure this hit to improve your mental health from a mental coach? Because right now, what I am going to tell you will change your idea of mental health and life… It’s not what you want to hear. It’s what you need to hear.

But before we get into it, let me explain how I, Ritu Singal, work.

I do this as my purpose and not merely as a profession. That’s why I will be direct and blunt, with no sugarcoating.

If you want someone to listen to your same problem more than 100 times with no initiative to solve it, then I am not the one for you. You need a best friend, not a life coach.

Yes, it will fill my pockets listening to you talk about the same problem over and over again. But life coaching isn’t my only income. I have 3 other companies too — one is a leather manufacturing company, and the other is a real estate company. Plus, I am a keynote speaker and an author. Coaching isn’t all about money for me.

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Yes, if you’re dealing with learned helplessness, paralyzing guilt, anxiety, and procrastination, I will help you change your mindset and transform your habits. However, you ought to do the work — only then can we get ahead.

Chekout: Why should you consider attending online life coach counseling sessions?

Transform Your Life: Coaching for Clarity, Confidence, and Success

But remember, I am not your psychologist. I am not here to diagnose your mental illness or tell you why you behave the way you do, or focus on clinical performance. I am no doctor. I am a person with a solution-oriented yet empathetic approach, certified by the John Maxwell Team of Life Coaches.

Plus, if you’ve read my book “I Decided Not to Cry”, you know why and how I became a mental health coach.
I’ve watched my mother suffer from mental illness. I’ve also treated and transformed 100+ lives.

Emotional Honesty: Letting Go of Overthinking

Here’s something I’ve noticed with many of my clients — they keep justifying their behaviour based on their past. They keep telling me why they are the way they are because of something that happened to them in childhood. Past experiences do play an important role in shaping our present. But if you believe that you are going to remain the same for the rest of your life because of that one incident, then that’s not fair to you or to the people who love you.

Would you let your child not play with somebody just because a toddler said they didn’t do things properly? Then why do you do it to yourself?

I know your life has been a repeat of recovering from the same unpleasant event. There are patterns in your life. A baby falls so many times when it’s learning to walk again, yet a baby smiles. No one says that the baby is stupid or not smart for learning how to climb up. Then why are you judging yourself for doing so? Why do you put yourself down?

In this process of learning how to get out from your paralysed old wounds, you will fall — over and over and over again.
But I will be like your mother — guiding you and cheering for you at each step.
But you will have to be like that cheerful baby.
You will have to stop being hard on yourself.
And I will teach you how to be kind to yourself.
I will teach you how to separate yourself from the clutter that you have in your head.

But will you stop yourself from playing and enjoying because you need to be “healed”?

I’ve seen people on the other end of the spectrum, where they get so absorbed by self-improvement and healing, they don’t allow themselves to enjoy or go for big things in life because they feel they are not ready for it.

Let’s break myths: You don’t need to be fully healed to start living

You don’t have to be fully healed. There will always be something you will need healing from. But if you’re not taking the right steps towards healing, then it is a problem.

Perfectionism is the biggest killer of healing, as clients want to be perfectly healed and they keep sabotaging life.
There will be more problems in life. Problems in life won’t end — otherwise, what is the fun of life?
The idea is to find joy in the chaos, with your head in the sky.

I am here to tell you — you will make it in life.
Be open to change and embrace happiness and opportunities when they knock at your door.
Like right now, you have the opportunity to be coached by me or to take sessions from someone else to help you level up in life.

And if finance is your problem, remember I am a business coach and entrepreneur of three successful companies.
I can help you build financial discipline and learn how to make the most out of your work.
To know more, you can check my website.